I Used to Know You
by DCFanatic4life
Summary: When tragedy befalls Chris Jericho, he's left to pick up the pieces of his life. Completed
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: The characters in this story do not belong to me. They belong to themselves, and their gimmicks belong to Vince and WWE.  
  
Summary: I'm not going to give away the actual plot, but know that this has a lot of weird twist and turns in it, and I'm not entirely sure it'll all make sense, but hell it's fiction, anything's possible right?  
  
Oh, and there's no specific time frame, but Hunter and Stephanie were never married.  
  
~  
  
"Goodbye Stephanie," Chris whispered as he put a single rose on the white casket.  
  
The rose lay among many, the whole casket being adorned with them. There were white ones, red ones, and her favorite, pink ones. The mourners all watched as the casket was lowered into the ground. Chris couldn't watch, and cast his eyes on the others who had attended.  
  
He saw Vince and Linda, barely containing themselves, knowing they would never see their daughter again. Linda was leaning into Vince for support, her eyes brimming with tears. Shane stood silently next to them, his stony gaze set forward, trying to keep his composure for Linda. He handed her a tissue, which she gladly accepted.  
  
He looked over to the other mourners, most of them from WWE. There was Kurt silently crying, trying not draw any attention to himself. He saw Matt and Lita staring at the ground, not wanting to watch the casket being lowered either. He saw so many of his colleagues openly cried as the first sounds of dirt pounded on the casket that now lay beneath the ground.  
  
He didn't want to hear that sound. He had read in a book somewhere that the sound of dirt against a casket was the most final sound in the world. He had never believed it until this moment. It was final, and the sound kept repeating, and repeating until he felt like throwing himself in the grave itself, and begging them not to bury her.  
  
After the ceremony was over, everyone filed out silently except for him. He couldn't leave just yet. He walked over to the gaping hole in the ground and stared to the bottom. He could still make out the casket easily, despite the roses, and shovels of dirt that now spotted the pristine white casket.  
  
A tear fell from his cheek and into the grave as he thought about her, about them. She had been taken away from him much too soon. He didn't know how he was going to cope now that she was gone. It had all happened in a blur, one moment she was here, and in the next, she was gone, like a light breeze. His head was still spinning from all the arrangements that he had had to make.  
  
He sat down on the grass next to her grave, his head buried in his knees and he cried, not caring who saw him. He was beyond caring at this point. His life was gone, and now he had nothing to live for. Except her, he thought, he had to live for her. And that's why he kept getting up in the morning, that's why he had to try, for trying's sake.  
  
"Chris, are you ready to leave?" Chris looked up and saw Shane standing in front of him, a look of pity clear on his face.  
  
"I don't think I'll ever be ready to leave her Shane," Chris told him, not bothering to wipe the tears that he knew were staining his face, "I feel like I'm abandoning her or something."  
  
"You're not abandoning her, you can't stay here forever."  
  
"I know."  
  
"And Regan's waiting for you in the car."  
  
"Yeah? She woke up?"  
  
"Yeah, and she wants you," Shane said to him, motioning for Chris to follow him.  
  
Chris slowly got up and turned around one last time, looking at Stephanie's grave. He had to keep reminding himself that she really wasn't in there anyway. After the plane had crashed in the North Sea, there had been no survivors, and her body had never been recovered. The thought was unsettling to him. She was nowhere, like she had never existed. Now she was only in pictures, and old videotapes, and in the memories of all who knew her.  
  
Chris turned back towards the awaiting limo, and sighed before climbing inside. Vince and Linda were sitting on one end, and Vince had his arms wrapped around a sobbing Linda. Shane was sitting next to his wife, Marissa, who was holding a baby in her arms. She saw Chris sit down, and went to hand him the little girl.  
  
He took the baby in his arms, and like always, he thought of her. He couldn't help it, the little girl had Stephanie's eyes. He could always have a little piece of her as long as he had his little girl. The baby smiled at him, and he held her in his arms as she giggled, not knowing that today was a day of mourning and sadness. Not knowing that she had just lost her mother.  
  
He sat the infant on his lap, and she grabbed his hands, content to just play with his fingers. Her infant curiosity drawing her to the gold ring that adorned his left hand, going to take it off. He couldn't help but smile as she struggled to get the ring off his finger. He couldn't help but remember when Stephanie had put that very ring on his finger.  
  
And now she was gone.  
  
So what do you think? Be honest. I'd like to know if this is worth continuing. And as always, if you want to be brutal, go right ahead. :) 


	2. Chapter 2

~Two weeks earlier~  
  
"Aww, Daddy, I don't want to go," Stephanie whined into the phone. Chris lay next to her in bed, as he watched her on the phone.  
  
"But Stephanie I need to you to go, we need a McMahon representative to do the press junkets."  
  
"Daddy, can't Shane do it?"  
  
"No, Shane has to stay behind, Stephanie will you please do this for me?" Vince asked nicely.  
  
"Fine Daddy, but you owe me now," Stephanie relented. She rolled her eyes towards Chris.  
  
"Ok Princess," he said before they said their goodbyes and hung up. Stephanie lay back on the bed, resting her head on Chris's shoulder.  
  
"So I take it you have to go to Europe," Chris whispered into the morning air.  
  
"Yeah," Stephanie sighed, as she stroked the top of her daughter's head, who was currently lying on Chris's chest.  
  
"We'll miss you," Chris said smiling down at her.  
  
"I wish I didn't have to go, I always have to be the one to go overseas for different tours."  
  
"It's because you're the best McMahon for the job."  
  
"I'm sorry, I'm not a McMahon, I'm a Jericho," she said grinning at him. He grinned back at her.  
  
"Sometimes I forget," he said laughing softly, the movement causing Regan, their six-month old daughter to hold her head up in curiosity. Stephanie kissed the top of her head, before Regan once again laid her head on Chris's chest.  
  
"Well, you should remember next time," she said pretending to be upset.  
  
"Forgive me?" Jericho answered, giving her his best pout.  
  
"Don't give me that face, aww don't make me feel bad for you...Of course I forgive you, idiot," she finished laughing, as she leaned up to kiss him.  
  
"Good, I don't know what I'd do if you never forgave me," he said winking at her.  
  
"I really don't want to go though. I hate the fact I have to leave you and Regan behind."  
  
"We'll be fine, I'm sure we can manage by ourselves for a few days, can't we Regan?" Jericho said tickling the little girl's feet, causing her to giggle and smile.  
  
"Yeah, but I'll be gone for five days, that's the longest I'll have been away from her."  
  
"I'm glad you're thinking of me as well," he said sarcastically.  
  
"Of course I think of you," she said kissing him, "But I've been away from you for longer, and besides Regan's my baby."  
  
"We'll call you everyday."  
  
"Promise?"  
  
"Of course we promise."  
  
~A few days later (At the airport)~  
  
"Ok, so you have all the numbers that I gave you, and my itinerary, and you have all numbers in case there's an emergency at home right?" Stephanie asked quickly.  
  
"Yes, yes, now you need to stop worrying."  
  
"I can't help it, I worry."  
  
"I know," Jericho said, leaning in to kiss her.  
  
"I love you," she said to Regan, who smiled, she turned to Chris, "And I love you too."  
  
"I love you," he said kissing her again.  
  
"Well, I've gotta go," she said as she broke away, "I'll miss you both."  
  
"We'll miss you too," he said. She kissed him again, and then kissed Regan, before turning to go into the airport.  
  
"Have a nice flight," he called.  
  
"I will," she called back before disappearing into the airport.  
  
~A few days later~  
  
"So how's the press thing so far?" Jericho asked her over the phone.  
  
"It's ok, there are a lot of fans in Great Britain."  
  
"I know," he said chuckling.  
  
"Shut up," she said jokingly.  
  
"So where are you headed to next?"  
  
"I'm scheduled to go to Norway tomorrow, I'll be catching a flight tomorrow morning for that. Then I'll make a quick stop in Germany, and after that I'll be on my way back home, thank goodness."  
  
"Sounds fun," he said sardonically.  
  
"I wish you were here, and Regan too."  
  
"Well, we wish you were here."  
  
"How is my baby?"  
  
"She's fine, you want to talk to her?"  
  
"Definitely," she replied, before she heard a shuffling noise, and then the giggling that could only be her daughter, "Hey baby, it's Mommy, I miss you so much, and I can't wait to come home so I can see you. I love you"  
  
Stephanie could hear more giggling before Chris came on the phone again. She smiled as she thought of the smile that she knew would be on both their faces. If anything, Regan was a Daddy's Girl. She guessed it ran in the family.  
  
"So we'll see you in a couple days then." She heard his voice say over the line.  
  
"Yeah, I'll see you in a few days."  
  
"Ok, I love you Steph."  
  
"I love you too."  
  
~The next day~  
  
Chris was sitting down on the couch watching some television as Regan was taking her nap. Stephanie hadn't called him that morning, and he hoped that she would call him once she got to her hotel in Norway. She was probably going to be doing promotional signings and interviews all day, and he wanted to speak to her before she was too tired to talk.  
  
The phone rang in the kitchen and he got up to answer it. He didn't want the noise to wake up Regan. He hoped it was Stephanie, he missed her.  
  
"Hello," he answered.  
  
"Chris?" a choked voice asked. Chris was able to recognize the voice as Vince's.  
  
"Yeah, Vince is that you?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"What's the matter? You sound upset."  
  
"Chris, I've got bad news," Vince said, choking back a sob. Chris got a sinking feeling in his stomach. There was only one reason that Vince would call him with bad news, and that reason was his life.  
  
"Is it Stephanie, is she ok?" he asked frantically, his heart pounding.  
  
"Her plane, it crashed, no survivors," Vince managed to stutter out the information.  
  
Chris felt his entire body go numb. He dropped the phone with a loud bang, but he didn't care. He looked out the window and saw it was a beautiful day. And he couldn't see anything but the grayness that was slowly seeping into his body. It was like he was trapped in an eternally beautiful moment, but he wasn't able to feel it, because he was wrapped in complete pain.  
  
It seemed as if time stopped, and everything ceased to be, except for him standing in his kitchen, knowing that he had lost his Stephanie. This is it, he kept thinking, this is the very moment where his life ended. Everything around him had suddenly changed, without any warning, and it was all gone. Time seemed to start again, and Chris found himself standing in his kitchen staring down at the phone, but not caring enough to pick it up and talk to Vince.  
  
Instead he collapsed to the ground in tears. 


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Based around the song "Ghost" by Eastmountainsouth.

**To read the original version with song lyrics go to: bitter-solemnity. com /fics /IUTKY.php (just get rid of the spaces).

* * *

**

**Back to present**

Chris woke up, and went to snuggle Stephanie beside him, except Stephanie wasn't there. It took him a moment to realize that she would never be there again. The sadness washed over him, just like it did every morning when he realized the love of his life was gone forever.

The pain was overwhelming and he never thought that it would get any better. He remembered a saying he had heard once, "It hurts, and it hurts, and it hurts, and then one day, you wake up, and it just doesn't hurt in the same way anymore." Now he just had to wait for that day to come, but he didn't think it would be anytime soon.

At least he had Regan though. He knew that if he didn't have her to live for that he would not be alive right now. He wouldn't have had anything to live for, not without Stephanie. But Regan gave him hope that someday, somehow, he might be able to get over the pain he felt every day. Slowly, but surely, he would heal.

He heard the high-pitched warbling of his daughter over the intercom, and he got out of bed to go retrieve her. Before he left the room, he took one last look at his bed, particularly the empty left side of it. Where she should've been. He sighed and left the room.

He reached his daughter's room, and saw her amusing herself in her crib. He picked her up and brought her downstairs to start another day. Sometimes the days seemed endless to him, but he made it through, somehow. He put his daughter in her high chair, and proceeded to make her breakfast.

He smiled as she played with various things on her high chair table. She was really the only reason he smiled anymore. She was the light of his life, the only thing that he had left to breathe for. And so he got up every day for her.

He knew everyone was worried about him. He didn't blame them really, if he were on the outside looking in at his life then he would be worried too. His mother had offered to come down and help him take care of Regan, but he had declined, opting to just take care of her himself. He knew that people were worried about him not sleeping or eating, but he was indeed doing both. He had a daughter to live for.

He hadn't gone back to work yet, even though he was seriously considering going back very soon. He needed something to do, being dormant wasn't his style. And if he got back in the ring, he would be able to vent his frustrations, and his anger that he felt for the world. He knew that he had to go talk to Vince about this.

Vince and Linda had taken the news hard. They made sure to come over once a week just to see Regan because she reminded them so much of Stephanie. They also made sure that Chris was doing ok, and that he could talk to someone who wasn't an infant. They all needed each other right now, and Chris was glad he was a part of such a good family.

He hadn't known what to do with Stephanie's belongings though. Everything that she had was still right where she left it. He couldn't bear to go into her closet, and see all her clothes. It would just remind him too much of her. He could still smell the faint smell of the perfume that she wore. It comforted him somewhat. The shopping list that she had written before she left still hung on the refrigerator door. It was all just the way she had left it, as if everything was just waiting for her return. A return that would never come.

A few days later

Chris walked into Titan Towers with Regan in tow. He had requested an appointment with Vince for today. He wanted to discuss his return, and when he wanted to come back. He received a few sympathetic stares, but he ignored them, not wanting anyone's pity.

He walked up to Vince's office, and his secretary told him to come inside. Chris walked in and saw Vince sitting at his large desk. Vince smiled when he saw the two of them, and went over to take Regan from Chris.

"Hey, there's my beautiful granddaughter," Vince said, holding Regan in his arms. He turned to Chris, "How are the two of you?"

"We're as good as can be expected," Chris replied.

"That's good to know. So what did you come here to discuss?"

"I want to come back Vince," Chris said bluntly.

"What do you mean?"

"I want to go back on the road."

"But Chris, you don't have to, we don't need you right now. You should just stay at home and take it easy. I know this has been difficult for you, and I don't want you to have to burden yourself with wrestling."

"Vince, I can't sit at home anymore. I'm surrounded by Stephanie, and I just," he paused, tears forming in his eyes, "I just can't stay there anymore. I want to be on the road again."

"I understand where you're coming from...but what about Regan?"

"She can come with me."

"Are you sure you're ok with traveling around with an infant. You can always have Linda or your mother take care of her while you're on the road."

"I'm not leaving my daughter Vince," Chris said with an edge in his voice. Vince looked into his eyes and understood. Regan was all he had.

"Ok, as long as you're up to it," Vince said giving in, "When do you want to come back?"

"As soon as possible."

Two weeks later

Chris stepped into the ring, his first match back since Stephanie had passed away. It felt good to be returning to his normal way of life. He felt like he was finally getting his life back to where it was before. He knew it would never be completely the same, not without Stephanie, but he was glad for the normalcy that he could achieve.

After the match, he walked backstage, and went to the dressing room he was sharing with Kurt Angle. Kurt was watching Regan for him, and when he walked into the room, he caught Kurt singing to the little girl. Chris cleared his throat, and Kurt looked up embarrassed. Chris laughed at him, and he realized that was the first time he had laughed for a long time.

"I think that's the first time I've laughed in a long while," Chris told him, toweling himself off.

"I'm glad I could help," Kurt said laughing too.

"It's actually really good to be back," Chris said, going over to pick up Regan.

"That was a great match out there."

"Thanks, it's good to know that I've still got that going for me."

"So how've you been otherwise?" Kurt said concerned for his friend.

"Considering the situation I've found myself in, I'd say pretty good. Regan and I are coping."

"That's good to hear, we've all been worried about you."

"Well, as long as I have her," Chris said kissing Regan's chubby cheek, "I'll be fine."

"Good to know," Kurt said before getting up, "I have to go film a promo, but I'll talk to you later."

"Yeah, bye Kurt."

He sat down on the couch and got Regan's bottle from the diaper bag. He fed her while watching the rest of the show. It really did feel good to be back. The only time he had been back since Stephanie's passing had been for a tribute show to her. He was glad to be back on the road, even if it was just Regan and him this time. He looked down at her, as she drank from her bottle.

"I guess it's just you and me kid."


	4. Chapter 4

~Two years later~  
  
Chris sat in his backyard, his two-year old daughter running around happily. It was a beautiful day, and he hadn't wanted to spend it inside. Besides it was rare that he had a whole four days off in a row. He wanted to make the best of his home time. He laughed as his daughter fell on her backside, and she looked at him with sad eyes obviously wanting Chris's attention. He went to pick her up as they both sat on the grass just horsing around. He loved hearing his daughter laugh, it was one of the most rewarding sounds he could ever hear.  
  
The past two years had passed in relative calm. He and Regan continued to be on the road, and Regan had managed to charm everyone backstage, and was one spoiled little girl. He guessed that she reminded them all of Stephanie, and that was one of the reasons they loved her so much.  
  
She was so much like her mother, and Chris could see a little bit more of Stephanie in her every day. She looked like Stephanie, the same hair, eyes, she was going to be beautiful like Stephanie had been, he could tell. The little girl was also headstrong and stubborn just like her mother had been. The look that she had gotten on her face the first time she had walked was one Chris would never forget. It was the look of determination that he had seen all too often on Stephanie. Sometimes when she smiled he felt like he was looking at Stephanie.  
  
He still missed Stephanie terribly, although it did get a little better every day. He had managed to clear out a lot of her things, and they now sat in his attic. It had been hard the day he had taken the last of her clothes out of the closet, but in the end, it felt good to be moving on. He just had to take it a little bit at a time.  
  
He thought about her often, sometimes it would just be what he saw of her in Regan, and other times he would walk by a picture of her, and he would stop to look at it, and think about her. He knew that time was healing all his wounds, and someday they might even be gone.  
  
He had even managed to take Regan to Stephanie's grave at the cemetery. That had been a very emotional day for him. They stayed there for a long while just talking to her, and hoping that wherever she was that she was happy and that she was looking over the both of them.  
  
Although Regan's first word had been 'Daddy,' surprisingly 'Mama' had come soon after. Chris would show Regan pictures of Stephanie, and they would watch old videos of her. He didn't want Regan growing up without knowing the spectacular person that Stephanie had been. He wanted Stephanie to be as big a part of Regan's life as he was.  
  
"Daddy?" Regan said in her cute little voice.  
  
"What is it sweetie?"  
  
"Wefwing," she managed to say, and Jericho knew that she wanted to watch wrestling.  
  
Regan had really taken a liking to wrestling, and given the family that she had been born into it was a good thing she did. She loved to watch all of the matches, and when she was backstage she would clap for all the wrestlers when she saw them on the TV. She and Chris would watch wrestling tapes at home all the time.  
  
Chris took her inside, and popped a wrestling tape in the VCR. As the tape started, he realized that he had put in Fully Loaded 2000, with the Last Man Standing Match between Triple H and himself. That had really been a great match, and both men had come out of it looking like winners, but he also knew that the tape contained a lot of Stephanie.  
  
He watched the first match silently, knowing that Stephanie was soon to show up on his screen. This had been during a time when they had been hating each other. Although they hated each other on-screen, off-screen they had been really good friends, which had eventually led to romance.  
  
Stephanie came on-screen with the flowers that he had been "sending" her throughout the night, and he smiled at the memory. He had put an actual note in one of the bouquets, saying how really spectacular she really was, and she had given him the most beautiful smile he had ever seen. He had always loved her smile, not the bitchy smirk she had used on camera, but her genuine smile.  
  
He looked towards his daughter, and she saw her eyes light up when she saw Stephanie. It made him feel good to know that he had succeeded in giving Regan at least a little piece of her mother. He tried his hardest to show Regan what a good person Stephanie had been, and how much Stephanie had loved her before she had died.  
  
"That Mama," Regan said, pointing at Stephanie, and then looking back at him with a big smile.  
  
"It sure is," he said smiling back.  
  
"Where you?"  
  
"I'm coming up," he told her. She nodded and went back to staring at the television screen.  
  
He watched the rest of the tape, and then it finally came to the Last Man Standing Match. He watched as Stephanie blew a kiss at him, and he remembered how she was supposed to act disgusted by him. He laughed at the thought of her hating him, when in reality they had never hated each other.  
  
"Daddy, look, look," she said pointing again to the screen.  
  
Chris looked and he saw himself putting Stephanie into the Walls of Jericho. He had put her in that so many times that he had lost count. He had always made sure that he never put any real pressure on her, and would always check on her afterwards to make sure that she was fine. She had told him she always loved when he did that.  
  
"It walls, it walls!" Regan said laughing. Even though she was two almost three, she still knew Chris's finishing moves.  
  
Chris smiled at her youthful exuberance. If only Stephanie were here to see it, she had loved Regan so much. Then his life would be perfect. He sighed as he sat back and watched the rest of the tape in relative silence.  
  
It was near the end of the main event between Chris Benoit and The Rock, when Chris heard the phone ringing. He didn't want to pick it up, but figured he might as well answer it. He got up to go into the kitchen, and answer the phone.  
  
"Regan, stay here ok?"  
  
"Kay" She said not taking her eyes off the screen.  
  
He figured she would be ok for a second while he went into the kitchen. Chris walked into the kitchen and answered the phone, before walking into the living room again.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Chris, it's Vince."  
  
"Oh hey Vince, and before you ask, we're both fine."  
  
"You know me too well," Vince said chuckling, "Actually I was confirming that you were going on the Europe tour."  
  
"Yeah, we are."  
  
"Ok, I just wanted to make sure that you were. Don't forget we're leaving on Monday."  
  
"Ok."  
  
"Oh, and Linda says hello, and tell Regan she said hello to."  
  
"Sure thing, bye"  
  
"Bye."  
  
Chris thought about going to Europe. He hadn't been there since Stephanie had passed away. When he and Regan went there next week, he wanted to go to the beaches at the North Sea on the edge of England, where Stephanie's plane had gone down. He was hoping to find some closure there.  
  
And maybe, finally, he would be able to say goodbye. 


	5. Chapter 5

Chris and Regan got on the plane the next Monday, and everyone greeted them warmly. Regan had every single one of them wrapped around her little finger and she knew it. They sat down in their seats, and prepared to take off.  
  
"Daddy, where going?" Regan asked looking out the window.  
  
"We're going to Europe," he told her.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because Daddy has to go over there to wrestle."  
  
"Ok," she said, "I see wefwing too?"  
  
"Yes, you can watch the wrestling too," he replied, leaning over to kiss her forehead.  
  
"Yay," she said clapping her little hands together. Chris laughed before buckling their seatbelts.  
  
Chris sat back in his chair and felt the plane starting to take off. His journey was just beginning. He knew that the next few days were going to be hard on him. He accepted that fact, and knew that he would come out of the whole experience stronger. He was hoping to find some sort of closure, some understanding as to why Stephanie had been taken from him. He just wanted some justification.  
  
He hadn't been back to Europe since before Stephanie had left the world. He hadn't enough courage to come here at the time. He couldn't bear going to the places that she had spent her final few days. But now he thought he was ready. He was ready to see the places that Stephanie's eyes had last gazed upon. It seemed comforting in a way, that maybe Stephanie's presence could be felt there.  
  
He wanted Regan to see these places as well. She would never get to know Stephanie personally, but he wanted to give her as much of her as he could. He hoped this trip could give Regan a little bit more of Stephanie than what she saw in the pictures that adorned their house, and the video tapes they religiously watched. By being able to be where she was, to see what she saw, Regan could feel Stephanie's presence.  
  
He was shaken out of his thoughts by his daughter, who was tugging on his shirt sleeve. She had managed to get out of her seat belt, and was now standing on the seat. He turned his eyes to her and her smiling face.  
  
"Daddy, what that?" she asked excitedly pointing out her window. Chris looked out and saw the great expanse that was the Atlantic Ocean. It stretched as far as the eye could see, and it was a mixture of deep blues, and sea greens. The sun could be seen reflecting off it, making it seem magical.  
  
"That's the ocean," he explained to her, "Its all water."  
  
"All?" she asked her eyes wide in awe.  
  
"Yeah," he said smiling at the look on her face.  
  
"I go tell Gampa Vince," she said as she started to climb across him.  
  
"Ok, but be careful all right," he told her.  
  
She nodded, and climbed down off of the seat and got into the aisle. She ran up to Vince who was sitting a few seats ahead of them, working on a laptop. Regan stopped next to him, and started tugging on Vince's pants. He looked down at her and smiled brightly.  
  
"If it isn't my beautiful granddaughter Regan," he said to her, as he put his laptop down and pulled her to his lap, "Can I have a kiss?" Regan obediently kissed him on the cheek, before turning her excited eyes toward the window.  
  
"Gampa, look window," she said pointing to the window.  
  
"What is it?" he asked patiently.  
  
"All water," she said happily.  
  
"I see," he said laughing at her excitement. Regan jumped off his lap, and proceeded to run back towards Chris. Chris thought she was going to come back to her seat, but she spotted Kurt, and decided to run to him instead.  
  
Regan adored Kurt, and she was always following him around backstage. Kurt even let her wear his medals when he wasn't using them. Kurt didn't mind, he loved the little girl. He had been best friends with Stephanie, and seeing Regan made him feel like Stephanie was still with them.  
  
"Kurt!" she yelled happily running to him as fast as her little legs could carry her. Chris looked back at them and laughed. He loved seeing his little girl happy. It made him think he was actually doing a decent job raising her on his own.  
  
"Hey there cutie," Kurt said smiling at her.  
  
"Water!" she said excitedly, pointing out the window again. Kurt laughed at her, as he had seen the scene she had made before with Vince.  
  
"I know, there's a lot of water. But guess what?"  
  
"Wha?"  
  
"I got you something," Kurt said as he went for his bag under the seat. Regan's eyes danced with anticipation. She loved getting gifts, but what little kid didn't? Kurt pulled out a coloring book, and a brand new box of crayons. Regan's eyes lit up, and she started jumping up and down.  
  
"Coworing," she exclaimed jubilantly. She threw her little arms around Kurt's arm, since that was the only thing that she could reach. He handed her the coloring book, and crayons, and she took them anxiously.  
  
"Reg, what do we say?" Chris said from his seat.  
  
"Thank you," Regan said politely to Kurt.  
  
"You're welcome," Kurt said to her.  
  
She went back to her seat, and began to color furiously in the book. She was still too young to color in the lines, but she still loved to just color nonsense all over the pages. Chris knew that would probably keep her occupied for a while. He turned back to Kurt.  
  
"Kurt you didn't have to buy her anything," Chris said to the other man.  
  
"Nah, I wanted to," he said shrugging it off.  
  
"Well, it's still cool of you."  
  
"I know I'm cool," Kurt said laughing.  
  
As Regan was coloring, Trish came up and sat in the empty seat next to Chris. Chris smiled at her as she sat down.  
  
"Hey Chris, how are you?"  
  
"I'm good Trish, and you?"  
  
"I'm cool, I'm really excited for the tour, I love going overseas."  
  
"Me too, I used to love wrestling in Japan, it's a great country over there."  
  
"Really, I haven't been there on any of the tours, I'd like to go someday," Trish said smiling at him, "Maybe next time when we go to Japan, you can show me around?"  
  
"Sure, if that's what you want."  
  
"I'd really like that," she said to him.  
  
"Great."  
  
After another couple of hours, they were finally ready to land in England. Chris held Regan's hand tightly as they landed. His heart contracted as he realized he was finally here. He would finally be seeing where Stephanie had been right before she had left.  
  
A/N: Could something be going on with Trish and Jericho?? Dun dun dun, you'll just have to wait and see.  
  
And yes it is possible for me to write a non-Smoochy fic, doesn't mean I like to, but I can. 


	6. Chapter 6

Chris drove up to the beach, and parked the car. Vince had been kind enough to give him the day off, the rest of the crew flying to Germany that day. He was getting his own flight tomorrow. Vince had understood his need to come here, to see this place.  
  
He got out of the car, and then helped Regan out of her car seat. They walked to the beach slowly. The damp morning fog still lingering, despite the fact it was almost 2 o'clock. The day itself was gray, matching the current mood he was in.  
  
He took Regan into his arms and walked down to the water's edge. The water gently lapped up to his feet, not quite reaching him, then receding back into the murky unknown. The beach was mostly deserted, which Chris didn't mind all that much, he'd rather be alone. He did notice some people way down at the other end, but didn't bother to see what they were doing.  
  
He stood there in relative silence as he looked out over the water. It stretched as far as he could see. He knew somewhere in there, in it's watery depths was Stephanie. This was her permanent home. Her final resting place. The grave at home, in the cemetery wasn't really where she was, it was just symbolic of the fact that she was gone. This was where she really was.  
  
He noticed the gentle calm on the water. It didn't seem like something that could snatch his wife away from him so suddenly. It didn't seem like the killer that it had been on that day two years ago.  
  
He thought of Stephanie, and what she must have been thinking as the plane made its final plunge. She was probably thinking about him and Regan. He hoped that they had been happy thoughts, hoped that she hadn't been in pain as the water had come and taken her from him.  
  
"Daddy?" Regan questioned, snapping him out of his thoughts.  
  
"Yes Princess?"  
  
"Why here?" Chris knew that she was asking why there were here.  
  
"You see all that water out there?" he said pointing with his free hand.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"That's where Mama is," he told her.  
  
"Can go to her?"  
  
"No, we can't go to her," he explained sadly.  
  
"No?"  
  
"Because Mama went up to heaven after she was here." Regan nodded her head, and looked out again.  
  
"Me miss Mama," Regan told him. Chris knew that she was probably too young to even remember Stephanie, but the little girl still knew her from all the things that Chris would show her about her mother.  
  
"I know, I miss her too," Chris said, kissing her forehead. She rested her head on his shoulder, and he sighed.  
  
It was hard being here, harder than he had expected it to be. To actually be at the place where she had passed away brought him an overwhelming pain. All the feelings he had felt on the day when she had died came rushing back to him.  
  
He remembered slowly picking himself off the kitchen floor when Regan had woken up from her nap and started crying. He remembered holding her so tightly, afraid that God would take her too. If He didn't mind taking Stephanie from him, who knew what else could happen?  
  
The few days after that day were probably the worst of his life. People constantly calling and sending their condolences, it was pure torture. Having to make arrangements for his wife's funeral, having to look at coffins, buy a plot, it was heart wrenching. He never wanted to have to feel that again.  
  
He noticed Regan dozing off on his shoulder, and he just let her sleep. Maybe it was the ocean air lulling her to sleep, or maybe, just maybe she was able to feel Stephanie, and she was lulling her to sleep.  
  
"It's beautiful isn't it?" Chris heard a voice behind him, but didn't bother to turn around. He just wanted to be alone with Regan, so they could think about Stephanie.  
  
"Yeah," he said.  
  
"I like to come out here sometimes and just look at the water."  
  
"This is the first time I've ever been here," he said, still not turning around. He could tell the woman was behind him a little ways away.  
  
"I live inland a bit, but I like to come out here every so often."  
  
"It's very nice."  
  
"I find it so peaceful out here."  
  
"It is pretty calm."  
  
"Yeah, you should see it in the winter though, it's so angry."  
  
"I know the feeling."  
  
"Of what, being angry, or knowing what it looks like when the ocean's angry?"  
  
"Both I suppose." Chris was trying to appear disinterested so the woman would go away. He really wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone right now. But maybe talking to someone would help.  
  
"My wife died out there," he told her.  
  
"Oh, I'm so sorry."  
  
"She was in a plane crash a couple years ago, and she didn't survive. They crashed in this sea."  
  
"Is that why you're here?" she questioned.  
  
"Yeah, it's the first time I've been able to bear coming here. It was so hard you know?"  
  
"I'm sure it would be."  
  
"I finally gathered up the courage to come here, to see the last thing she ever saw."  
  
"I've been coming here as long as I can remember."  
  
"Yeah?" Chris still didn't turn around, instead keeping his gaze focused on the water.  
  
"Of course I can't remember that long."  
  
"If I can be blunt, why?"  
  
"I have no memory from before a few years ago."  
  
"How did that happen?"  
  
"I was attacked. That's the last thing I can remember. I was walking down the street, and I was jumped from behind by two people, I remember they were a male and a female. They took all my belongings, and beat me senseless."  
  
"That's horrible," Chris said disgusted that people would attack someone else.  
  
"Yeah, they beat me so bad I was in a coma for a couple of days. I came out of it fine physically, but I've lost my memory. The doctors say that someday it might come back, but so far nothing."  
  
"That must be scary."  
  
"It was at first, not knowing who I was or where I belonged. No one filed a missing person's report in the States that fit my description, where I presume I'm from, seeing as I have no British accent. So they assumed I didn't have any family. The hospital gave me a job, so now I work in hospital administration."  
  
"At least you're story has a somewhat happy ending."  
  
"Yeah, I mean I'm doing fine now, I still wish I could get my memory back though. It scares me to think that I have a family out there somewhere who don't know what happened to me, who worry about me, and I can't even tell them I'm ok."  
  
"Is that why you come out here, to think?"  
  
"Yeah, some of the time."  
  
"And the rest of the time?"  
  
"I don't know, I just feel drawn here. Like today, for instance, I felt this need to come here, like I was going to find something. Like a link to my past, something was just pulling me towards here, and I knew I had to come."  
  
"I can understand that."  
  
"Maybe you're the reason, who knows, I just knew that today I HAD to come."  
  
"I'm Chris Jericho," he said looking forward still. He could feel her walking over towards him and stand next to him. He didn't bother looking over at her, her presence was enough for him.  
  
"I'm Emma Branson, or at least that's the name I've adopted, I don't know my real one."  
  
"That must suck, to not even know your own name," he said, shaking his head.  
  
"You learn to live with it," she shrugged, then looked over at the little girl sleeping in Chris's arms, "Is that your daughter?"  
  
"Yeah, she's my world."  
  
"She's beautiful, what's her name?"  
  
"Regan."  
  
"From Shakespeare?"  
  
"Yeah," he said surprised, "Most people don't make that connection."  
  
"I don't know. It was just the first thing to pop into my mind. How old is she?"  
  
"She's two, she'll be three in a month."  
  
"Aww, she really is adorable. How old was she when you're wife died?"  
  
"She was six months."  
  
"Wow, so you raise her by yourself?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"It must be hard."  
  
"She's worth it," he said, gently stroking Regan's hair as the little girl slept quietly in his arms.  
  
"I can see that," she studied him for a moment, "I must be really annoying you. I mean you've probably come here to reflect, and here I've spoiled it."  
  
"No, it's ok."  
  
"No, I'll go, I'm sorry," she told him.  
  
"No, stay, I'd like you to," he said, finally turning to the woman.  
  
His eyes widened in shock, and his jaw dropped. She was beautiful, the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen in his entire life. She was breathtaking, and he felt something he hadn't felt in two years, he felt true happiness seeping into his veins. She was really here.  
  
"Oh my God," he whispered in disbelief.  
  
"What?" she asked looking at him awkwardly.  
  
"Stephanie!"  
  
A/N: Bwahahahahaha! Now you must wait for the next chapter. And I hope you're all ok with who turned out to be the mystery woman. ;)  
  
Oh yeah, and Stephanie's not dead, SWERVE~! (well for everyone except Karla, because she knew already lol)  
  
Did you really think I would have him get with some random chick or Trish even, no way! 


	7. Chapter 7

His brain couldn't process anything at the moment. His mind was swirling with crazy thoughts. Stephanie, HIS Stephanie was standing right in front of him. She wasn't dead! He wanted to cry tears of joy, but he was absolutely frozen in place. The shock was overwhelming, and he just stood there staring at her.  
  
"I'm sorry, but I don't know what you're talking about," she said to him her brow furrowed in confusion.  
  
Chris still couldn't speak, it was as if his vocal chords were paralyzed, and he couldn't make a sound. The love of his life, the woman he had been mourning for the past two years, was right here. Someone had given her back to him.  
  
"Are you ok?" she asked again, her cheeks reddening slightly as his eyes bored into hers.  
  
He wanted to say something, say anything, but he couldn't. What could he possibly say to her to make her understand just who she really was? How did he tell her that he was her husband, and that he was holding their child in his arms?  
  
"I'm just...shocked," he managed to sputter out.  
  
"Why? Is there something wrong?"  
  
"No, suddenly everything just became very right."  
  
"Who's Stephanie?" she asked her eyes wide in question.  
  
Chris didn't know how to answer that. He wanted so badly to just grab her and kiss her, and hold her in his arms until all the pain and anguish he had suffered over the past two years went away. But she didn't know any of that, and he didn't want to scare her away.  
  
"Stephanie was my wife," he told her, silently willing her to suddenly get her memory back.  
  
"Do I remind you of her or something?" she asked smiling.  
  
"I don't know how to tell you this, but you ARE Stephanie," he told her.  
  
Her eyes grew wide, and she took a step back. Chris knew that she was shocked by this revelation. She blinked her eyes a few times in disbelief. Then she turned to look at the water, then back to him.  
  
"But-but you said your wife was dead."  
  
"I thought sh-you were," he said correcting himself.  
  
"Then I can't be her, you must just think I look like her. Your wife is dead."  
  
"No, you're right here, you don't just look like her, you're Stephanie."  
  
"I can't be, I wasn't ever in a plane crash," she said taking a few steps backwards.  
  
This was just as overwhelming for her. This man she had just met was claiming to be her husband. She didn't even recognize him. She looked around, trying to think of a way to escape this confrontation.  
  
"When were you attacked, what day was it?"  
  
"Why?" she asked more confused than ever.  
  
"Please, just answer the question," he pleaded with her.  
  
"It was November 6," she told him after thinking about it for a moment, "That's what they told me at the hospital."  
  
Chris gasped. It was all becoming clear to him now. The whole situation was being sorted out in his brain. This woman wasn't a Stephanie look-a- like, no matter how many times she said it. This was his wife.  
  
"November 6 is when the plane crashed." She stood silently for a moment.  
  
"It could be a coincidence," she said quietly.  
  
"No it can't be, it all makes sense, the beating, the plane, everything."  
  
"I don't understand."  
  
"Let me explain," he said looking at her, "The plane, you were never on it. You never made it to the airport. You were attacked, and then left for dead. They never found your body when the plane crashed, only your identification. The people who attacked you were probably on the plane. But you can't remember anything, so no one ever contacted us."  
  
"Us?"  
  
"You're family. You have a family Stephanie, they've all missed you terribly. You're father, mother and brother."  
  
"My name is Emma, not Stephanie, and I still don't believe you," she said weakly. This was becoming too much for her. What if she really was this man's wife? What happened then?  
  
"What's it gonna take for you to believe me?"  
  
"I don't know, but I really want to leave," she said turning to walk away.  
  
Chris couldn't let her leave. He had to get through to her, at any cost. He had to make her see who she really was. He couldn't lose her a second time, he refused to lose her again.  
  
"You said you were drawn here today," he called out to her, hoping that she would stay.  
  
"So?" she said with her back to him.  
  
"Why do you think that is?"  
  
"I'm drawn here a lot, the atmosphere is so peaceful, I come here when I'm under a lot of stress, it means nothing."  
  
"But today, of all days, why?"  
  
"I don't know ok! Stop asking me all these questions," she said frustrated.  
  
"I think you were drawn here, because I was here, and because Regan was here."  
  
"No, that's not it at all," she said shaking her head, "Stop trying to put these crazy ideas in my head."  
  
Chris looked at her walking away, and noticed the ring that she was wearing on her right hand. He thought of something quickly, something that he hoped would get her to stay, and at the very least listen to him.  
  
"The ring," he called out desperately. This time she turned around.  
  
"What ring?"  
  
"The ring you're wearing," he told her.  
  
She looked down at the gold band that she wore on her right hand. It was the only piece of jewelry she had had after her attack. She didn't know where it had come from, but she really cherished it. It was like a silent link to the past she couldn't remember.  
  
"What about it?"  
  
"Look inside," he urged her.  
  
She hesitantly took the ring off of her finger. Then she turned it so she could get a better look at the inside.  
  
"Yeah? So?"  
  
"CJ & SM- Match Made in Heaven," he told her. She looked down at the ring, and gasped.  
  
"That's what it says," she said almost inaudibly. For some reason or another, she had never really looked inside the ring.  
  
"I know, because I had them specially engraved," he told her, moving himself around to show her his ring that he still had on his finger, while still holding the sleeping girl.  
  
Stephanie slowly looked up at him. Confusion in her eyes still, but mixed with a bit of acceptance. There was no denying it now, she really was who he claimed her to be. She was his wife.  
  
"So I'm Stephanie...your wife, and that little girl's mother?" she asked quietly.  
  
"Yes, yes you are." 


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: The poem "Non Sum Qualis Eram Bonae Sub Regno Cynarae" does not belong to me.  
  
A/N: Thanks so much for the reviews, they've been wonderful, and I really appreciate them. This chapter is quite long, and probably my favorite so just sit back, and hope you enjoy.  
  
~  
  
//Last night, ah, yesternight, betwixt her lips and mine  
  
There fell thy shadow, Cynara! thy breath was shed//  
  
Chris had managed to get Stephanie to come with him to dinner, so they could talk some more. They were now in his car driving back to Manchester, where Stephanie had been living. He kept stealing glances at her when she wasn't looking. It was all so surreal. Stephanie was actually sitting next to him.  
  
She was still beautiful. Her long brown hair was cut shorter, a little bit past her shoulders, and it had blond highlights in them. But for the most part, she was still Stephanie. She didn't even really act that differently. She was a little more soft-spoken now, she hadn't used the screechy voice since they had started talking, causing him to not recognize her voice. But she still had that stubbornness and confidence that he had always loved about her.  
  
He noticed that she kept looking at the little girl in the backseat. He couldn't blame her for wanting to look at Regan. If he had no memory, and had just found out he had a beautiful little girl like Regan, he'd be staring at her too.  
  
//Upon my soul between the kisses and the wine;  
  
And I was desolate and sick of an old passion,//  
  
"So, where do you live?" Chris asked her, trying to make conversation.  
  
"I own a flat in the city," she told him, "And you?"  
  
"We have a house in Connecticut."  
  
"Really? Is it nice?"  
  
"Well, it's a bit cluttered with toys," he said chuckling, "But for the most part yeah."  
  
"Why Connecticut?"  
  
"It's hard to explain, but basically that's where the company we work for is based, and it's where your family lives."  
  
"Oh, I see. Do you have any pictures of my family?"  
  
"Yeah, I do, we can look at them at dinner, is that ok with you?"  
  
"Yeah, sure," she said looking back again at Regan, who was still out like a light.  
  
"She missed her nap yesterday," Chris explained to her, "That's why she's so tired today."  
  
"Oh," Stephanie said.  
  
//Yea, I was desolate and bowed my head:  
  
I have been faithful to thee, Cynara! in my fashion.//  
  
Chris turned back to his thoughts, letting Stephanie think for a while. He wanted his Stephanie back, but if he wanted that, he had to do it himself. He didn't want to call Vince, and get his hopes up about the whole thing, and it would be better to tell him in person. He would just have to call him, and tell him he couldn't make it tomorrow. He grabbed his cell phone, and dialed Vince's number.  
  
"Hey Vince," Chris said when the phone was picked up.  
  
"Chris, hello, how are you?" Vince asked, concerned with how things had gone.  
  
"Actually, I'm really good," he said, sending a glance over to Stephanie.  
  
"Good, good, so why are you calling?"  
  
"Vince, I need to ask you a huge favor."  
  
"What?" he asked suspiciously.  
  
"I need to skip the signing tomorrow," he said hesitantly.  
  
"What? Why?"  
  
"There's someone here I want to get to know better," he said, trying not to give anything away.  
  
"You met a girl?" Vince asked incredulously. It was a well-known fact that Chris hadn't dated anybody since Stephanie's death, and he hadn't ever wanted to.  
  
"Yeah, I guess you can say that."  
  
"Well, I'm happy for you," Vince said truthfully. He knew that Stephanie was gone, and Chris had to move on. And maybe get a mother for Regan.  
  
"So you're cool with it?"  
  
"Yeah, go have fun."  
  
"Wow, thanks Vince. Bye"  
  
"Bye."  
  
//All night upon mine heart I felt her warm heart beat,  
  
Night-long within mine arms in love and sleep she lay;//  
  
Chris smiled as he got off the phone. He hadn't expected Vince to be so nice about it. He thought maybe Vince would feel offended if he thought Chris was going out with another woman when he had been married to Stephanie. But then again, he didn't know the truth of the situation.  
  
"Who was that?"  
  
"My boss."  
  
"Ok."  
  
"And your father," Chris said looking at her reaction. She seemed a bit surprised.  
  
"Your boss is my father?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"What do you do?"  
  
"It'll probably be better if I explain that at dinner."  
  
"Ok," she said smiling slightly.  
  
//Surely the kisses of her bought red mouth were sweet;  
  
But I was desolate and sick of an old passion,//  
  
They arrived at a decent looking restaurant that Stephanie had recommended, and Chris proceeded to wake Regan up in the back seat as Stephanie looked on. He gently shook the little girl. Regan opened her eyes slowly.  
  
"Hey there baby, do you want some dinner?" he asked her softly. Regan yawned and smiled brightly at him.  
  
"Yay!" she yelled.  
  
"I guess that means yes," he said laughing. Stephanie smiled as she heard the precocious two-year old for the first time. Chris lifted her out of her seat, and put her down outside.  
  
"Where eat?" she asked looking around.  
  
"Hold my hand, and we'll go ok?"  
  
"Kay," she told him, grabbing onto Chris's hand, holding it tightly.  
  
"And we have a very special person joining us for dinner tonight," he said kneeling down to her level, as he brushed some of her tousled hair back.  
  
"Who?" she asked excited. She loved being around people. Stephanie kneeled down as well, and spoke to Regan.  
  
"Hi, I'm going to be having dinner with you, is that ok?" Stephanie said smiling. Regan furrowed her brow thinking for a second before going closer to Chris.  
  
"Daddy, she look like Mama," Regan whispered to him, even though Stephanie could still hear her. Chris laughed at her innocence.  
  
"I know sweetie, I know, but this is Emma," Chris explained to her, not wanting to confuse the child before he and Stephanie worked things out. He also didn't want to get her hopes up, or his for that matter.  
  
"Hi Emma, I Regan," she said. She stuck her hand out like she had seen her grandfather do all the time. Stephanie shook the child's hand.  
  
"Hi Regan, it's very nice to meet you," Stephanie said.  
  
//When I awoke and found the dawn was gray;  
  
I have been faithful to thee, Cynara! in my fashion.//  
  
They walked into the restaurant and got a table. Regan was currently scribbling all over the placemats they had with the crayons Kurt had given her. Chris looked at her for a moment, before turning his attentions to Stephanie.  
  
"You're great with her," Stephanie told him.  
  
"Thanks, I don't know what I'd do without her."  
  
"She, um, looks like me," Stephanie said, not sure how Chris would react to her saying that.  
  
"Yeah, she acts like you too, or at least how you used to act."  
  
"So about this whole situation..." her voice trailed off.  
  
"Yeah...."  
  
"I guess I'm your wife then."  
  
"I guess so," he said laughing nervously.  
  
"I'm sorry I don't remember any of it," she said apologetically.  
  
"It's not your fault." He wanted to grab her hand and reassure her, but he didn't know how she would feel about that.  
  
"I guess not, but I feel terribly guilty for not being able to remember you."  
  
"Don't. Did you want to know about your family?"  
  
"It would be nice yeah?"  
  
"Well, your father's name is Vince, and your mother's name is Linda. You have a brother named Shane."  
  
"I see, and what do they do, you said my father was your boss."  
  
"Your family owns World Wrestling Entertainment."  
  
"You mean my family owns a wrestling company, but wrestling is so fake and stupid."  
  
"You used to work there, in fact, the reason you were in England in the first place was to go on a promotional tour for the company."  
  
"Really?" she asked surprised.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"And you, what do you do?"  
  
"I'm a wrestler."  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry I insulted it then," she said turning red from embarrassment.  
  
"It's ok, you don't have to keep apologizing."  
  
She nodded her head in response. Regan looked up from her seat and took the placemat she had been drawing on and handed it to Stephanie.  
  
"Here you go," Regan said.  
  
"Thank you," Stephanie said looking at the scribbles on it.  
  
"It a flower, you look sad, I give you picture," Regan said proudly.  
  
"Well, now I'm happy," Stephanie said smiling at her child, even though she couldn't remember her. Regan nodded, grabbed Chris's placemat, and started scribbling over that one.  
  
"She just got new crayons the other day," Chris explained, "They're from her favorite person."  
  
//I have forgot much, Cynara! gone with the wind,  
  
Flung roses, roses riotously with the throng,//  
  
She nodded as their waiter came to take their orders. He took down everything they wanted. The waiter left, and Chris looked at Stephanie and smiled. Even now, she was so predictable, she had ordered her favorite meal, a chicken sandwich with extra barbeque sauce, no onions or lettuce, and French fries with parmesan cheese sprinkled on top. He laughed softly.  
  
"What's so funny?" she asked him, cocking her head to the side.  
  
"Nothing, it's just that's your favorite meal," he told her.  
  
"I guess I was a predictable person."  
  
"Nah, you always kept me on my toes."  
  
"So how did we meet?"  
  
"I came into the company from a rival one, and we became friends. And then that just turned into more."  
  
"I see," she said nodding, "And how long had we been married? You know before?"  
  
"Two years, and we were together for a year before that."  
  
"Wow. So we've been married for four years?"  
  
"Yeah, even though I thought you were dead, and you don't remember the last two," he said giving her a smile. She smiled softly back at him.  
  
//Dancing, to put thy pale, lost lilies out of mind;  
  
But I was desolate and sick of an old passion,//  
  
Chris was still in shock that he was sitting across from his Stephanie. Granted she didn't remember anything, but he still had her here. He couldn't believe he was actually awake, he had had dreams like this before, only to wake up to the cold reality of his life. And now she was truly here.  
  
"So, do you have pictures of my family?"  
  
"Oh yeah, of course," he said, reaching into his pocket, pulling out his wallet. He opened it up and started showing her pictures. A lot of the pictures were of Regan, understandably. He flipped to one of Stephanie, him, and her family from their wedding.  
  
"This is your family," he told her. She looked at them, her brow furrowing, trying to conjure up anything that she might remember.  
  
"I assume this was our wedding," she said quietly.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"It looks like it was nice."  
  
"Well your father pulled out all the stops, nothing was too good for you."  
  
"He sounds like a good man."  
  
"Sometimes," Chris said laughing to himself, thinking about Vince.  
  
"I wish I could remember, it seems like I had a good life."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
//Yea, all the time, because the dance was long;  
  
I have been faithful to thee, Cynara! in my fashion.//  
  
Their food came then, and they both ate silently, occasionally engaging in some chit-chat. Stephanie watched as Chris helped Regan with her food. He was so good with the little girl. Stephanie wished that she was able to feel something for the two of them, to remember what it had been like before. But she just felt like she was an outsider looking in.  
  
After they ate, Stephanie turned to him, her face serious. She had to tell him something, and she wasn't sure how he would take it. She saw him letting Regan lay down in the booth, obviously still tired, and it was getting late in the evening.  
  
"Chris." He turned to her.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Where do we go from here?"  
  
"I don't know," Chris answered truthfully. He wanted his Stephanie back, but he couldn't force it out of her.  
  
"Chris can I tell you something honestly?" she asked.  
  
"Of course," he said sincerely.  
  
"I'm not Stephanie," Chris looked at her confused, "No, I mean, I may be Stephanie, in name, but I'm not that woman anymore. I can't remember ever being that woman, and I may never again. I'm sitting here looking at these pictures of myself with my family and I don't even know them. And you, I don't even remember loving you, or being with you. You're just someone I met on the street who happened to know me. And as much as I love the thought of being a mother, I don't know that little girl. Frankly, I have no feelings whatsoever."  
  
"But hopefully eventually you would remember," Chris said, trying to reason with her, not liking where she was going with this.  
  
"I'm Emma Branson, that's who I remember being. I really want to remember, believe me, it seems like my old life was fantastic, but that's what it was, my old life. I have a new one that I'm quite comfortable with. I can't have all this shoved on me at once, I'm sorry."  
  
"What are you saying?"  
  
"Maybe, maybe it would be better if I just stayed dead-"  
  
"But-" Chris interrupted.  
  
"Please let me finish. I'm happy now, I am. And you look like you're fine, and it would only hurt everyone involved if I suddenly came back, except I couldn't remember. I might NEVER get my memory back, and I might never feel for any of you what you feel for me. So in a way, Stephanie is dead. So why don't we just keep it that way?"  
  
//I cried for madder music and for stronger wine,  
  
But when the feast is finished and the lamps expire,//  
  
Chris felt like he was losing Stephanie all over again. She was right of course. She wasn't really Stephanie, and she might not be ever again. He loved a woman that didn't exist anymore. She was someone else in Stephanie's body. But he still didn't want to give her up. There was always the chance that she would remember.  
  
"But I love you, I can't let you leave again. Do you even know what it's been like for me?"  
  
Stephanie cast her eyes down, "No."  
  
"I went for two years thinking the love of my life died. And I didn't even get to say goodbye, do you know how that feels? To lose someone, and not get to tell them what they meant to you, how much you loved them. I had to live thinking my wife was dead, that the other half of my soul was gone, do you know how painful that is? I had to take care of a baby by myself. And I woke up every morning thinking that the only thing I woke up for was my daughter. I had to remind myself to breathe because every day I hurt. I suffered so much in the last couple years."  
  
"I know, and I'm sorry, but that doesn't change anything."  
  
"But you can still get your memory back, and maybe if you came home with me it would trigger it."  
  
"I don't think so, I don't want to be found. Let's just let Stephanie die ok? Please?"  
  
Chris looked into her eyes, and he didn't see Stephanie. He saw a completely different person. No matter how much she acted like her old self, Chris realized that she wasn't her old self. Maybe he really did have to let go. At least this time he would be able to say goodbye.  
  
"Ok," Chris said slowly, sadly.  
  
"Thank you," she said gratefully.  
  
//Then falls thy shadow, Cynara! the night is thine;  
  
And I was desolate and sick of an old passion,//  
  
They left the restaurant, and Chris drove Stephanie back to her flat. All throughout the drive, Chris couldn't help but look over at Stephanie every so often. If this was the last time he was going to see her, he wanted to remember every last detail.  
  
He felt his heart constrict at the thought of losing her again. It had been bad the first time, but now, now he knew she was out there. He knew that his Stephanie was out there, but not with him. The thought of her with other men, being with someone else, getting married and having kids without him made his heart ache. He would die alone, and she would move on, and undoubtedly forget that she ever even had a previous life.  
  
He pulled up a few blocks away from her apartment building, and went out to open the door for her. He took Regan out of her car seat, and proceeded to walk Stephanie to her door. He wanted to spend every moment that he could with her. Even if she didn't remember who she was, Chris did. And Chris could never forget her, like she would him.  
  
"So I guess this is it," she said, turning to face him.  
  
"Yeah, I guess so," he said looking down.  
  
"I'm really sorry about all of this," she said looking at him, and Regan who was standing beside him.  
  
"It's ok, you didn't know," he said actually meaning what he said.  
  
"Goodbye Regan," Stephanie said kneeling down to her level.  
  
"You keep my picture?" Regan asked.  
  
"I'll keep it for always," Stephanie told her, holding on to it with one hand.  
  
"Ok...Bye-bye," she said smiling at her. Stepahanie kissed Regan's forehead before rising.  
  
"Well, I'm going to go now, it was nice meeting you, and at least finding out about my past. It's a real reassurance. I guess you'll want this back," she said, starting to take her wedding ring off her finger.  
  
"No, it's yours, I gave it to you, keep it," he protested, knowing he would lose all control if he had to take her wedding ring back. It was the only physical link Stephanie had to their marriage, and he wanted her to have it.  
  
"Ok."  
  
He took out his wallet and fished out a picture of the three of them from before Stephanie left on that infamous trip. They were all smiling, and he looked at the picture a moment before looking back up at Stephanie.  
  
"Here, this is for you," he said giving her the picture, wanting her to at least have a little piece of him and Regan to keep forever.  
  
"What's this for?" she asked taking the picture from his hand, pausing to look at it a moment.  
  
"Just something for you to remember us by. If you ever feel lonely or unloved, you can look at it and know that there's at least two people out there who love you more than life itself."  
  
"Thank you," she said genuinely.  
  
"Goodbye Emma," he told her, not wanting to use the name Stephanie. This wasn't Stephanie.  
  
"Goodbye Chris."  
  
//Yea hungry for the lips of my desire:  
  
I have been faithful to thee, Cynara! in my fashion.//  
  
Before he could stop himself, Chris brushed away a lock of hair that was blocking her face. He let his hand run down, and cup her cheek. He leaned in and kissed her softly. He just wanted to kiss her one last time, something he had been denied of the last time. He felt Stephanie kiss him back briefly, and for a moment, he could really believe that she was here, but he reminded himself that she wasn't and he pulled away.  
  
"Bye," she said, ducking her head. Chris started to walk towards his car, bending down to pick up Regan.  
  
"Goodbye Stephanie," he whispered to himself, letting her go once and for all.  
  
THE END  
  
...  
  
...  
  
Just kidding! There's still more to come! 


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Based around the song "Don't Know Why" by Norah Jones.

**To read the original version with song lyrics go to: bitter-solemnity. com /fics /IUTKY.php (just get rid of the spaces).

* * *

**

Stephanie walked up into her flat, and turned on the light. She walked into her kitchen and laid the picture Regan had drawn for her and the picture Chris had given her down on the table. She picked up the photograph and stared at it for a moment. The person in the picture that used to be her looked so happy, her eyes shining bright. It was really too bad that she would never get that back. She put the picture down, and started to walk towards her bedroom, tired from the day's events.

She walked into her bedroom, and turned on the lights. She walked into her bathroom and looked into the mirror. She stared at herself for a moment, just studying herself. She couldn't help but think about what she had found out today.

She had found out her past and who she was and she had left it behind. She had made the hardest decision of her life. It wasn't that she wanted to give up her old life, but what would be the point if she couldn't remember who she was? There was no point going back to a life she couldn't remember.

She got ready for bed and climbed in her bed. She turned on her side and thought about Chris and Regan. He seemed like a good man, and she could tell he had truly loved Stephanie. She could plainly see that all throughout the night he had been hoping that she would get her memory back. She had even started hoping that she would get it back, just to see that sad look in his eyes disappear.

And the little girl, her little girl, she was such a beautiful child. She wanted to remember anything, everything about her, but she couldn't. Her brain still drew an incredible blank when she tried to think back to two years before. It was so frustrating knowing that she had a family that she couldn't remember. And she had a daughter, a piece of her, and it tore her up inside that she couldn't feel anything for her.

She turned around again, trying to fall asleep. She had to move on, that was the only thing that she could do. Everyone she used to know had moved on, and she knew now that she could move on too. Sure people had missed her, but they didn't know that she hadn't died. It really was the right decision for her to not be found. It saved a lot of people a lot of heartache and grief.

Except for Chris.

Chris put Regan into her car seat and got into the car. He pulled away and started driving towards the hotel he and Regan were staying at. He couldn't help thinking about Stephanie as he drove to the hotel. He had found her, then lost her...again.

"Daddy?"

"Yes baby?" Chris asked, turning his attention to his daughter.

"Why Emma look like Mama?"

Chris was surprised by the question, and he didn't know how to answer that. He didn't want to tell Regan that the woman they met tonight was her mother. It would only get Regan worked up and thinking that her mother was still alive. It was one thing for his heart to be broken, but he would not let anything hurt his little girl.

"She just looked like Mama, sweetie, sometimes people look like people you know," he explained to her.

"Really?" she asked in wonderment.

"Yes sweetie."

Regan seemed pleased with the answer, and went back to looking out the window. Chris went back to his thoughts. He couldn't tell anyone about finding Stephanie, it wouldn't change anything, wouldn't bring her back. Bringing more people into this would only bring more pain. This was something he would have to bear alone.

They reached the hotel and walked up to their room. Chris got Regan ready for bed and tucked her into one of the beds in their room. She fell asleep quickly and he watched her sleep for a while. He sighed as he thought about what she would miss out on by not having Stephanie. He thought he did a pretty good job raising her alone, but he couldn't do everything. He stroked her soft brown hair as she slept, before getting ready for bed himself.

He lay in bed later, staring at the ceiling. He wondered what Stephanie was doing, if she had thought about him and Regan since they left. Probably not was what kept going through his mind. She had decided not to even try to remember, why would she want to remember at all?

He wondered what would become of Stephanie, now that she was really and truly broken off from him. He had let her go, and it had been the single hardest thing he had had to do in his life. When he thought she had died, he had no choice but to accept it, but it was different now. Now he had to move on knowing that he would never love anybody else. It wasn't an option for him to be with someone else, not while he knew Stephanie was alive.

He couldn't help the tears that started running down his face. He tried to be macho and not cry, but when Stephanie was involved his feelings came first. He was almost regretting finding Stephanie, he almost thought that maybe she should never have been found, if this was the outcome. But how could he ever regret anything that involved Stephanie? He should be thankful that Stephanie was alive, regardless of whether she was with him or not.

"Daddy." He could hear Regan say to him. He turned his head and saw her standing next to his bed. Her hair was disheveled from sleep and her pajamas were rumpled.

"What is it Princess?" he whispered.

"Can I sleep with you?"

"Of course you can Princess, climb on up."

Regan climbed into the bed, and crawled over to where Chris was. He lifted the covers so she could climb in. She settled herself in next to him, and snuggled into him. He pulled the covers over them, tucking her in. Chris stroked her hair as she closed her eyes.

"Thank you Daddy," she told him as she started to fall asleep.

"You're welcome baby," he whispered, letting her fall asleep.

Chris reminded himself that he still had a lot of good things in his life. He had so many things to look forward to. He had friends, family, a good career, nice home, many things that made his life worthwhile.

But the most important thing was lying in his arms.

Stephanie was still having a hard time falling asleep. The day kept running through her mind. The way that Chris had looked at her when he realized who she was. She couldn't ignore the look on his face. She saw love in his face. She saw love for her in his face. She had been alone for so long it was odd seeing someone who loved her.

She hadn't been in love, or at least she couldn't remember the time when she had been in love. But Chris obviously loved her, or more accurately the former incarnation of her. She almost wished that she could love him back. He wasn't bad to look at, and he seemed like a really great person. And the way he treated Regan, she smiled as she thought of the little girl.

She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep, wondering if she would ever find that happiness that she had once had.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Thanks for all the wonderful reviews, I'm glad you all are enjoying the story and don't worry, there's a lot more story to come. :)

~

"Daddy, I'm going to go out sightseeing," Regan called getting ready to leave the hotel room they were staying at.

"Ok, Regan," Chris called out.

_"Do you want to come?"_

_"No, this is your graduation present, go enjoy yourself without your Dad being around," Chris said laughing._

_"But Daddy, I came here with you, besides I'm going away to college in the fall, and I won't see you as often."_

_"I'm going to go somewhere today, so you go enjoy yourself."_

_"Ok, I'll see you later for dinner."_

_"Don't do anything stupid," Chris said jokingly._

_"Me?  As if that were even possible, I'm perfect.  Bye Daddy."_

_Chris watched as Regan left the hotel room.  She had grown up to look just like Stephanie; she even acted like her.  She had wanted to come to Europe for her graduation present from high school.  They were in England for a few days, and Chris was about to go see Stephanie.  It had been fifteen years since he had seen her._

_He hadn't tried to contact her again after he had found out she was alive, and he had kept her a secret for this long as well, even from Regan.  He had moved on from her, he even resumed dating again, he never married, or even really sustained a long-term relationship, mainly because he still loved Stephanie.  Yes, it had been fifteen years, and he still loved her._

_Chris got into his rental car, and started driving to her flat, or at least where she had been last.  He hoped that she still lived there.  He had written down the address a long time ago, just in case he ever wanted to come back.  He found it, and went up to the door.  He took a deep breath, and knocked on the door.  He waited for a moment, before someone opened the door.  And Stephanie stood before him._

_"Hi, can I help-Chris?" Stephanie asked surprised, not recognizing him at first._

_"Hi Emma," Chris said, letting his breath out._

_God help him, she was still beautiful, and he couldn't take his eyes off of her.  He hadn't realized just how much he had missed her.  He tried to block any feelings when it came to Stephanie.  It usually failed, but he tried not to hurt anymore than he had to._

_"Won't you come inside?" she asked._

_He nodded, "I'd like that."_

_They walked inside, and Stephanie led him into the kitchen.  He looked around, and his eyes fell on a worn placemat that was hanging on the refrigerator.  He was surprised to see it hanging there._

_"Please, sit down."  They both sat down at the kitchen table._

_"So how are you?" Stephanie asked._

_"I'm good, good," Chris answered, "And you?"_

_"I'm great, so what are you doing here?"_

_"Oh, I'm here with Regan, it's her graduation present."_

_"Wow, she graduated already?"_

_"Yeah, about three weeks ago.  I noticed you have her drawing hung up."_

_"Yeah, I said someone at the hospital made it for me."_

_"I see."_

_"Do you have a picture of Regan, I'd love to see her."_

_"Of course," Chris said, pulling out his wallet, he took out Regan's graduation photo,  and handed it to Stephanie._

_"She's beautiful," Stephanie said, looking at the picture, "She looks so much like me."_

_"Yeah, she does."  Suddenly the door opened.  Stephanie handed him the picture quickly._

_"Emma, I'm home sweetheart," a male voice called out._

_"In the kitchen," Stephanie said smiling._

_A man walked into the kitchen, and walked over to kiss Stephanie.  Chris watched the little scene play out before him, and felt his heart break in the process.  So she had moved on.  And she was married, judging by the matching wedding bands, the ring he didn't seem to notice before on Stephanie's ring finger._

_"Who's this?" the man asked._

_"Oh, this is a friend I met at the hospital," Stephanie lied, "Samuel, this is Chris, Chris this is my husband Samuel."_

_"Nice to meet you," Samuel said, sticking his hand out to shake Chris's.  Chris slowly raised his hand to greet the man who had inadvertently stolen his wife._

_"Yeah, nice to meet you," Chris said slowly._

_"Well, darling, I'll be upstairs in the office if you need me," Samuel said, leaning down to kiss Stephanie again, before leaving._

_"So you're married?" Chris said._

_"Yeah, going on 14 years," Stephanie said with a strained smile, she could see the look on Chris's face.  Chris found himself jealous of her husband, jealous that he had been married to her for 14 years, and he had only been married to her for two._

_"Wow, so does he know about your past?"_

_"No, only that I have no memory, I didn't bother with the rest."_

_"Oh," Chris said, slightly hurt that she could so casually discard him and their daughter, "Do you have any kids?"_

_"Yeah, two, a boy and a girl. My daughter, Rachel, is 12, and my son Thomas is 8," Stephanie said grinning._

_"That's great, I'm glad you're happy," Chris said, lying through his teeth.  It hurt more than he could imagine seeing Stephanie's new life._

_"Thank you."_

_"Well, I better go, I promised Regan that I would be back in time for dinner, and I have a drive ahead of me, so I'm just going to head on out."_

_"Ok, it was nice seeing you again," Stephanie said, walking him to the door._

_"Yeah, you too."_

_"Oh, wait, before I forget," Stephanie said, walking away for a second then coming back, "I really should give you this, I don't think my husband would really appreciate me having another wedding ring."_

_Stephanie handed him her wedding ring, and Chris looked at it for a moment.  He was silently willing himself not to break down right then and there on her doorstep.  He had to stay strong.  It didn't matter that he hadn't been with the real Stephanie in over fifteen years, he still loved the woman she used to be, and now he had to take back one of the symbols of their love._

_"Thanks, take care of yourself."_

_"I will, bye," Stephanie said before closing the door._

Chris woke up suddenly the next morning, and it took him a second to recall what had happened the previous day.  He had lost Stephanie again, and this time he had to bear the load alone.  He figured it would be useless to stay in England another day, and he should probably just take his scheduled flight to Germany.  There was nothing keeping him here.

Regan woke up beside him, and she sat up and gave him a big smile.  Chris couldn't help but smile himself, glad that he had his little girl.  He really didn't know what he would do without her.  He leaned over and kissed her on the forehead.

"Good morning you," he said to her.

"Mornin Daddy!" she exclaimed, "What do today?"

"We're going to go to Germany."

"Why go there?"

"Cause that's where Grandpa Vince and everyone is."

"Kurt too?"

"Yes, Kurt too," he said laughing.

"Yay!" she said loudly, "You wrestle too?"

"Yes, I'm going to wrestle too."

"Can I watch?"

"Of course you can."

"Ok, let's go!" she said climbing out of bed.

"Well, we have to get our things ready first then we can go," Chris said laughing at her.

"Let's go!" Regan said as she went back over to the bed and grabbed his hand dragging him out of it.

Chris started laughing hysterically as he let himself be pulled out of bed.  He knew in that moment that he'd be all right.  He would make it through somehow.  He may not have Stephanie, but he could still go on, and he would.

*******************

Stephanie woke up, and got ready for work.  She had taken the day off yesterday, but today she had to go back.  She tried not to think of what had happened to her yesterday, not wanting to dwell on things past.  It was a new start for her.  She no longer had to worry about having family who missed her out there.  Her family didn't even know she was alive.  It was like a load had been lifted off of her shoulders.

She walked into her kitchen to make herself some coffee when her eyes fell on the drawing that Regan had given her, and the picture that Chris had given her.  She picked up the photograph again, and looked at the people in it.

It was obviously taken before she had lost her memory, and she looked at the three of them in the picture.  She couldn't help but let her eyes fall on the infant in the picture.  That was her baby, hers and she couldn't even remember her.  Somewhere deep inside she felt terribly guilty, like she was a horrible mother.  She shook the feeling away, and got her coffee.

Before leaving for the hospital, she took the picture Regan had drawn for her, and put it on the refrigerator door.  She smiled as she stood back and looked at it.  She may not ever be a mother to that little girl, but it was nice to think that she had a daughter out there.  Then she took the picture Chris had given her and put it in her wallet, thinking that would be a good place for it.

She walked outside, and started walking the short distance to the hospital.  She got to the hospital in no time and walked up to her station.  It wasn't the most glamorous job in the world, but she liked it well enough.  

"Hey Emma."

"Oh hey Beth," Stephanie said to her co-worker.

"You didn't come in yesterday."

"I know, I wasn't feeling that well," Stephanie lied, not wanting to bring up what had actually happened.

"Oh, I hope you're feeling better."

"Much, thanks for asking."

Stephanie took her seat behind the desk, and started working.  Her mind wandered to Chris again, and she wondered if he was ok with what had happened yesterday.  She may not know him, but she didn't wish him any sadness.  She may have no memory but she still didn't want to hurt him.

"Emma, Emma, Emma."  Stephanie looked up and saw one of the doctors that she worked for walking up to her station.

"William, hello," she said politely.

"And where were you yesterday?"

"I wasn't feeling all that well."

"Oh, and you feel better I hope?"

"I do, what can I do for you?"

"Do you have the files for Mrs. McGinty?"

"Of course," Stephanie said, looking through some files on her desk.  She found the right one and handed it to him.

"So are you doing anything Friday night?"

"Um, no, probably not."

"I was wondering if you'd like to go out for supper with me?"

Stephanie thought about Chris again.  She found herself worrying about his feelings, and wondering what he would think about this.  She felt for some reason that she would be cheating on him, he really did still love her.  And for some reason, she didn't want to betray him.

"William, thank you for the offer, but I'm not really interested," she answered.

"Ok, then, I'll see you later," he told her.

"Bye."

"Bye now."

*******************

Chris took his seat on the airplane after getting Regan settled.  He knew that he was leaving Stephanie behind as they took off.  He was leaving a huge part of his life behind.  He got a little teary-eyed as he let Stephanie go for the last time.  

The plane trip to Germany was fairly short and before he knew it they were landing.  Chris and Regan got off the plane, and got the rental car before heading to the hotel.  They checked in before going to their room.

"Regan?"

"Yes Daddy?"

"You know Emma, who you met yesterday?"

"Yes."

"We're going to keep her our little secret ok?"

"Ok Daddy," Regan said nodding.

Chris didn't want Regan to reveal that Stephanie was alive.  He knew Regan had no clue that it was Stephanie, but she could easily tell someone that they had seen someone that looked like Stephanie.  

They got settled in, and Chris figured that he might as well tell Vince that they had gotten back.  For all Vince knew Chris was staying an extra day in England.  Maybe if Stephanie had been willing to accept her past, he would still be there, but there really was no use dwelling on that.

The two of them went to the elevator and up the two floors to Vince's suite.  Chris knocked on the door waiting for an answer.  After a few moments Vince came to the door, a surprised look on his face as he saw them.

"Chris, what are you doing here?  I thought you were going to spend an extra day in England."

"That didn't pan out Vince, so we just decided to come here, so I wouldn't have to miss any of the press things."

"Are you sure?  If you met someone I don't object to it.  Stephanie's been gone for such a long time, I don't begrudge you if you find someone else."

"It doesn't matter Vince.  I realized that the only person I could ever love was Stephanie, and it's futile for me to try to move on when I still love her."

"I understand, did you see where her plane crashed?" Vince asked, his voice sullen.

"Yeah, I did, it was very eye-opening, I'm glad I got the chance to go there.  I found out some things," Chris said, thinking about Stephanie again.

"I'm glad you were able to see it, and Regan too."

"It was nice," Regan piped in.

"I'm sure it was beautiful," Vince said picking up the little girl.

"It was, it really was," Chris said, his thoughts on Stephanie and Stephanie alone.


	11. Chapter 11

A/N:  Sorry about the confusion with the last chapter…Anything in italics are dreams/flashbacks. :) And thanks for the reviews.

~

Chris looked out the window as they flew over the Atlantic Ocean.  Just a few days ago, he thought Stephanie was dead.  Little did he know that the trip would reunite him with his wife, and then separate them once again.  Each second that ticked by was one more second that he was drifting farther and farther away from her.

They got off the plane, and Chris and Regan were following Vince back to Vince and Linda's Greenwich home.  They had decided to have a family dinner as soon as they had gotten home.  Chris hoped that they didn't ask too many questions about his stay in England.

He didn't know if he could keep Stephanie a secret.  He felt bad for keeping this secret from them.  It wasn't that he wanted to keep Stephanie being alive a secret, he just wanted to spare their feelings.

Linda had taken Stephanie's death very hard, and she had never really recovered.  Chris didn't want to get her hopes up that Stephanie would be returning.  It would be cruel of him to give them Stephanie and then snatch her away just like that.

They arrived at their destination, and Chris and Regan got out of the car.  He picked her up as he walked into the house.  

"Sweetie, remember we talked about, we have to keep Emma a secret," Chris whispered to her.

"I know Daddy," Regan said, putting her finger up to her lips, making the shh sign.

"Good," he said kissing her cheek.

They followed Vince into the house, and found Linda, Shane, and Marissa sitting in the living room.  Shane and Marissa had had a baby two months ago, and Linda was holding the baby in her arms, smiling down at her.  Shane and Marissa were sitting on the couch, relaxing.

Chris briefly thought about how they would have felt if he had brought Stephanie home.  He could almost see the jubilant looks that would grace their faces.  Linda would be so happy, and Chris so wanted for his mother-in-law to see that Stephanie was ok.  Chris quickly banished those thoughts away, as he set Regan down.

"Hey, welcome home you three," Shane said as he spotted them.

"Hi," Chris answered.

Regan ran over to the baby that Linda was holding and started smiling at her.  Regan loved her little cousin and was enamored that something could be that small.

"Hi Gramma Linda," Regan said.

"Hello Regan, how are you?"

"I good," Regan answered before turning back to the baby, "Hi Unca Shane's baby."

"How was your trip?" Linda asked.

"It was nice," Chris answered.

"And Vince, did the shows go well?"

"Yes, the shows went fine, no problems."

"How did you like it Regan?" Marissa asked.

Regan ran over to the couch, and climbed onto it.  She climbed into Shane's lap, before smiling.  Shane kissed her little cheek, causing her to giggle.

"It very nice, lots of water."

"Lots of water?" Shane looked up at Chris questioningly.

"Um, we went to where Steph's plane crashed," Chris explained, noticing Linda's gaze turn from happy to downtrodden.

"How was it?" Linda asked.

"It was interesting," Chris answered as best he could, finding it hard to lie as he looked into Stephanie's family's faces.

They had dinner, and after Chris and Regan headed home.  Chris felt even worse now keeping his secret.  The discussion had reverted back to Stephanie a few times during the evening, with them recalling funny stories about her, trying to lighten the down-hearted mood.

As they were talking about Stephanie, Chris thought about how Stephanie used to be and how Stephanie was now.  Basically they were the same person, the person that he had fallen in love with, the spectacular person that he had known.  He found it hard not to love even the new incarnation of Stephanie.  She was still the same woman, just minus the memory.

He could've loved this Stephanie.  Even if she didn't remember anything about them, he could still have loved her.  Maybe if he had tried, or stayed, or done something, Stephanie would have seen, in her heart, that she loved him too.  He could live with her not having her memory, if only she was with him.

They got home, and Chris walked inside, and was once again assailed by Stephanie.  Their house had been adorned in pictures of her since she had "died."  Now he really didn't want to see any of these pictures.  They just reminded him of the loss that he had suffered a couple of days ago.  He had lost his wife not once, but twice.  Nobody should ever have to go through that.

**********************

Stephanie walked into her apartment a few days later.  She'd had a long day at work, and she wanted nothing more than to relax and watch some mindless television.  She walked into the kitchen to get some food, and her eyes fell again on the picture that Regan had drawn for her.  She smiled as she looked at it.  No matter what mood she was in, that picture seemed to make her smile.

She got some food, and walked into her living room.  She sat on her couch and settled herself in for a night of television.  She grabbed the remote, turning on the television, and flipping through the channels.  

As she flipped through the channels, she stopped on a particular channel that was showing wrestling.  Chris had said that he worked for World Wrestling Entertainment, and she figured this was it.  She sat there watching mesmerized by this life that she used to lead.  She figured that she had probably known most of the people that graced her screen.

She noticed a man that she recognized in the picture that Chris had shown her of her family.  It was her brother Shane, and she watched as he made his way down the ramp to the ring.  He proceeded to talk, and she listened intently.  That was her brother.  He was seemed like an intelligent well-bred guy, and she wondered if she had had a close relationship with him.

She watched some more, and noticed that they were announcing Chris as coming up next.  She sat on the edge of her seat, anticipating seeing him again.  She just wanted to make sure that he was all right, that he was doing ok.  She felt the inexplicable urge to check up on him.

After the commercial break, they showed Chris coming down the ramp, clad in red tights.  Her breath caught for a second, and she couldn't keep her eyes off of him.  Now that she knew who he was, she found herself wanting to know more about him.  She couldn't figure out why she felt this way.  Could it be that her heart was trying to tell her that she did love this man?

She watched as he fought, and though she didn't know much about wrestling she could tell that he was good at what he did.  She wondered where Regan was at the moment, maybe she was with her family or something, or with one of the friends she used to know.  

She sat there watching the rest of the show go by before turning off her television.  She decided to go to bed since she was really tired from work that day.  She got ready for bed and climbed in hoping for a good night's sleep.  

_"I love you."_

_"I know, you silly boy."_

_"And just how long have you known this?"_

_"I've known forever," she said snaking her arms around his neck._

_"And you never let me in on this little tidbit of information?"_

_"I thought I should let you figure it out by yourself."_

_"I hope you know that now you're stuck with me."_

_"That doesn't sound so bad," she said lightly kissing him._

_"Forever.  You're stuck with me forever."_

_"Forever…I like the sound of that."_

_"Me too."_

_"So was this your way of proposing to me?"_

_"I guess so," he answered._

_"You didn't even get down on your knee," she said pouting light-heartedly._

_He took her arms off from around his neck, and pulled away.  He dropped to his knee in front of her.  He grabbed her left hand and looked up into her blue eyes.  She smiled down at him as she prepared herself to hear him propose to her._

_"I have loved you for the longest time, and I think it's about time I made that official.  If you're willing to put up with me for the rest of your life, then Stephanie Marie McMahon will you be my wife, my love, my everything?_

_"Hmm………that's a tough question to ask," she said, pretending to think about it for a while._

_"You do know my knee is starting to hurt don't you?" he said jokingly._

_"Shut up, I'm thinking," she said good-naturedly._

_"Could you think slightly faster?"_

_"You can't rush something like this."_

_"Fine, but I'm getting up," he told her, before getting off his knee._

_"Hey, you're not supposed to do that."_

_"You haven't answered me, and it's lonely down there."_

_"Fine, I guess I'll marry you then," she said with a smirk._

_"It's about time," he said, picking her up and spinning her around, "I love you Stephanie."_

_"I love you too Chris."_

Stephanie woke up with a start, her breathing labored as she thought about the dream that she had just had.  Or was it a memory?  It had seemed so clear in her mind, like it had actually happened.  Could she be getting her memory back?  It hardly seemed possible.  She had gone for so long with nothing, and now, now she was remembering things.

She lay in bed, and smiled to herself.  Maybe slowly but surely she could be Stephanie again.  And maybe, just maybe, she could go back to her old life.  She could go back to the things she used to love.

She could go back to Chris and Regan.


	12. Chapter 12

_"Chris, I've got wonderful news."_

_"What is it baby?" he asked turning his attention to her._

_"Um, it's kind of ironic that you called me baby."_

_"And just why is that ironic?"_

_"Chris, can you come here for a moment?" she asked, beckoning him over._

_"Sure," he said getting up and walking over to her._

_"This is how it's ironic," she said taking his hand and placing it over her abdomen._

_"Huh, I don't get it," he said, confused._

_"This," she said gesturing towards his hand that was still on her stomach, "is on our baby, you called me baby, see that's irony."_

_"Baby?" he asked dumbfounded._

_"Yes," she said grinning, "I'm having a baby.  Our baby."_

_"Our baby," he whispered, " I'm going to be a Daddy?"_

_"Yeah."_

_He grinned at her, and placed his hand a little firmer on her stomach, before taking his hand off.  He took her in his arms and hugged her tightly to him.  She pulled away and laughed, happy tears coming to her eyes.  He leaned in, and kissed her tears away.  She hugged him again, letting herself melt into his embrace._

_"I love you so much," he told her._

_"I know."_

Stephanie shook her head, another memory floating into her brain.  They had been coming every so often.  She would get these flashes, these memories that kept replaying in her mind.  She didn't know what to make of them.  Should she tell someone, should she find some way to contact Chris and tell him?  If she did tell him, would he even care?

She found herself watching Raw and SmackDown every week just to see him, just to see Chris.  She now knew of all the wrestlers, though she didn't personally remember them.  But she really only cared about Chris.

She even started looking things up on the internet, trying to find out things about him, anything she could find.  She didn't know why, but she knew that she had a some sort of connection to him, something deeper that even loss of memory, time, nothing could ever change.  It was such a comforting thought when she thought that the memories wouldn't come back, when time passed between memories that flitted through her brain.

*********************

Chris walked backstage, wanting to see Regan.  The past few days, he had been thinking a lot about Stephanie.  He didn't know why, but he felt like she was thinking about him, that she somehow needed him.  Of course, he wouldn't let these thoughts linger for more than a few moments, not wanting to dwell on the woman who otherwise haunted his very soul.

He reached his dressing room, and quietly opened the door.  He saw Regan sitting next to Kurt watching the television with fascination.  She smiled at Kurt, and he remembered that smile on Stephanie, every time Regan smiled he would think about Stephanie, about everything he had lost in so short a time.

_"I hate you," she said giggling._

_"Aww, no you don't."_

_"Yes, I do, I hate your guts."_

_"Why is that?"_

_"You always have to do something incredibly sweet, knowing that I could never top it.  You do it on purpose."_

_"Hey, just because I like to do things for you doesn't mean that I'm trying to outdo you.  Hell, I don't want anything in return."_

_"Really?" she asked suspiciously._

_"Ok, maybe a little something."_

_"And what would that something be."_

_He leaned over to whisper in her ear, "Your smile."_

_"That's all?"_

_"Yup, that's it."_

_And so she smiled._

Chris was brought back to reality as he heard Regan giggling.  She was becoming more like Stephanie every time he looked at her.  Her birthday was coming up in a week, and he had planned a family barbeque at his house.  It kind of made him sad to think that Stephanie wouldn't be able to be there.  She had missed every single one of Regan's birthdays, and he knew she would miss every single one from now on.

"Daddy!"

"Hey there Princess."

"Good match," she said grinning.  

"Kurt have you been influencing her again?" he asked him, in a kidding tone.

"Maybe a little, but she loves it," Kurt said as he left the room for his match.

"Daddy, I get wefwing stuff for my birthday?"

"Hmm, we'll have to wait and see won't we?"

"Ok," Regan said pouting.  Chris went over and started tickling her.

"Don't you pout you little thing, you only have one week more to wait."

"Daddy, stop," she said giggling uncontrollably.

"Ok, baby girl," he said stopping his tickle assault on her.

He smiled as she went back to watching the show, noticing that Kurt was onscreen.  She was always attentive when Kurt was on.  He figured she had a little crush on him.  He realized most of the McMahons loved Kurt, he wondered if it ran in the family or something.

He thought about the party he was having next week.  He hoped it went off as planned.  He had been planning it for a while now.  He figured that having just the family was a good way to go, and maybe he would tell them about Stephanie, maybe they deserved to know about her.

*******************

_"She's beautiful," he said._

_"Isn't she?"_

_"She looks like you."_

_"You think?"_

_"Well, she's beautiful, you're beautiful, I figure that means she looks like you."_

_"You're too sweet.  How's your hand?"_

_"It's fine," he said holding up his hand, which was encased in a cast._

_"Good.  I can't believe you actually broke it.  You were really freaking out."_

_"Well, I've never had a baby before, I panicked," he said laughing, "So what do we name her?"_

_"What about those names that we had thought about?"_

_"She doesn't look like an Iliana or an Adriana."_

_"Yeah, you're right, so what do we name her?" she asked._

_"Regan," he suggested._

_"Regan?  Where'd you get that from?"_

_"Shakespeare.  King Lear, she's one of the characters," he explained._

_"I like that, Regan, that's a pretty name, I think that's what we'll name her," she said, before turning to the newborn, "Hey Regan."_

_"So, I guess this means we're like officially a family," he said smiling._

_"I guess so."_

_"I love you both more than life itself," he said._

Stephanie's eyes snapped open.  She realized it was morning and she'd had another memory disguised as a dream.  She looked to the calendar, and suddenly she remembered that today was Regan's birthday.  She didn't know how she knew, but she knew.

She realized in that moment that she wanted to go home.  She wanted to remember again.  But most importantly she wanted Chris and Regan.  She may not completely remember them, but that didn't mean she didn't need them.  Now she just had to figure out a way to find them.

She didn't know how she could get their phone number or address.  She didn't think that the information would be steadily available, considering Chris was pretty famous.  If she couldn't remember how could she find them?  She figured Chris would think that she would never want to see him, and wouldn't leave her any clue, would he?

The picture!  Maybe, the picture he had given her had something on it that she could use to find him.  She raced to her purse, and dug out her wallet.  She pulled it open, turning to the picture he had given her.  She took it out, and turned it over anxiously, silently hoping that it would have something that would help her.

She looked down at the picture, and as luck would have it, there was an address on it.  She didn't know if it was in Chris's handwriting, but there was an address on there.  She raced to the phone and booked herself on the next flight to Connecticut. 

**********

Chris laughed as he stood behind the barbeque in his backyard.  Regan was talking happily to Vince, telling her about all the things that she wanted for her birthday.  There was a big stack of presents inside the house from everyone in the company.  They were going to open them after they ate.

"Daddy, do I get to open presents now?" Regan said, tugging on his shorts.

"After dinner Princess."

"Is it after dinner yet?" she whined.

"No sweetie, not yet, it'll be ready soon ok."

"Ok," she conceded before running over to Shane.

"Chris, do you need any help?" Vince said, walking over.

"Actually, yeah, could you watch this while I go inside and get something?"

"Sure," Vince said, taking Chris's spot behind the barbeque.

Chris walked inside the house, intending to get the pepper and salt so he could season some of the stuff he was cooking on the barbeque.  He walked into the kitchen when he heard the doorbell ring.  Wondering who would be coming over, he walked to the door.  He opened the door and gasped when he saw who was on the other side.

"Emma!" he said shocked.

"The name's Stephanie."


	13. Chapter 13

"Stephanie?"

"Yeah, that's my name isn't it?"

"Yeah, but-but you said………what are you doing here?"

"I had to see you, I've been thinking about you and Regan non-stop since you left."

"You have?"

"Yes, I've been watching you on television, and I-I found myself missing you."

"Chris, who was at the door?" Marissa called out.

"Am I interrupting something?" Stephanie asked uncomfortably, thinking that he might be with another woman, and that she was too late.

"It's just a neighbor Marissa, I'll be right in," Chris said, closing the door, so he and Stephanie could talk in private.

"I must be too late," Stephanie said, her gaze on the ground.

"What?" Chris asked confused, then realizing what she thought, "Oh! No, no, Marissa is your brother's wife.  Your family is here because we're having a barbeque for—"

"Regan's birthday," she finished.

"Yeah, how did you know that?  Do you have your memory back?" Chris asked hopefully.

"No, I don't."

"Oh," Chris said, his hopeful smile fading.

"But it's coming back," she told him, "I keep getting these flashes, clear memories, and they come every so often."

"Really?"

"Yeah, and I wanted to find you.  I thought you'd like to know."

"How did you find us?"

"You're not very subtle," she answered, holding up the back of the picture, with the address on it.

"Well, it was worth a try, and it worked didn't it?" he said laughing a little.

"I want to remember Chris, but most importantly, I want to be with you and Regan when I do."

"Well, you're always welcome here."

"So I can stay?"

"Stephanie, you never have to ask to stay here, I guess that's the first thing you have to learn."

"And I guess I have a lot to learn right?"

"Not that much," Chris paused, "Um, would you mind if I hugged you?"

"No, not at all," she answered.

Chris tentatively stepped closer to her, and wrapped his arms around her.  Growing more confident, he pulled her closer to him.  She wrapped her arms around him, and hugged him back.  Chris clung to her tightly, so glad that Stephanie was in his arms again.  She might not exactly be the Stephanie he knew, but she was still here.  He pulled away and smiled at her, which she returned.

"I'm glad to see you," Chris said.

"I was a little bit afraid that you wouldn't want to see me, because of what happened."

"Stephanie, there will never be a time when I don't want to see you."

"Thank you for letting me come back."

"Thank you for coming back.  Do you want to come inside?"

"I'd like that, yeah," she answered.

"Your family is here, you can meet them," he told her.

"Great, I'd love to meet them."

Chris opened the door before he grabbed her suitcase with one arm and wrapped his other arm loosely around her waist.  She found his presence comforting instead of foreign.  They walked inside and Stephanie looked around trying to remember living here.  She vaguely knew her surroundings, having seen this place in her dreams, and the memories that she had been able to recall.  

"It'll probably be better if I tell them about you first before you just show up."

"You're probably right."

"Wait here," he told her, motioning for her to wait in the living room.

"Ok."

Stephanie watched him walk out into the backyard.  She walked over to the mantle, and looked at the pictures that sat perched on it.  She smiled as she looked at pictures from her and Chris's wedding, pictures of her and Chris, pictures of her and Regan, and Chris and Regan.  Her eyes fell on one particular picture, and her mind suddenly came to life.

_"Would you take the damn picture," she said, pretending to be annoyed._

_"Ok, why don't you come over and look at this thing, there's like 5000 buttons on here."_

_She walked over to him, and the camera he was looking at.  She shifted the infant in her arms, making sure that she was holding her tightly.  She looked at the camera, and sighed._

_"That one," she said pointing to one of the buttons._

_"Yeah, you've probably read the manual or something."_

_"Or maybe I'm not a huge idiot," she said raising an eyebrow._

_"Just sit down, so I can take the picture."_

_"Fine." She sat down on the bench, sitting the baby on her lap so they were both facing the camera._

_"Ok, here we go," he said pressing the button._

_He ran over to the bench and sat beside her, settling himself at her side.  He wrapped an arm around her waist.  He smiled at the camera, waiting for the flash to indicate a picture had been taken.  He noticed she wasn't smiling all that much._

_"I adore you," he whispered in her ear.  _

_Her smile widened as the camera flashed._

Chris walked out into the backyard, breathing deeply.  He kept thinking about how he was going to bring up the fact that Stephanie was currently standing in their living room.  How does one bring up the topic of someone who everyone thinks is dead, but really isn't?

"Chris, where've you been?" Shane asked.

"I was outside talking to someone."

"One of your neighbors right?" Marissa said.

"Um, not exactly, I have some news I have to tell you all."

"What news?" Linda asked.

"Please let me finish before you say anything."  Everyone nodded in compliance.

"Of course," Linda replied.

"When I was in England, and I went to where Stephanie's plane had crashed, I met someone there.  It was a girl, and she started talking to me as I was standing there looking out at the water.  I took her out to dinner that night, but after that we decided to part ways.  But she's here today, and I want you all to meet her."

"You met a girl?" Linda asked incredulously, saying what the others were thinking.  They had been under the impression that Chris would never get over Stephanie.

"Yes, but that's not the end of it," he took a deep breath, "The woman was Stephanie."

"What?" everyone exclaimed.

"Stephanie is here, and she's inside."

"Chris, are you joking with us?" Shane asked, looking at his mother, who had tears in her eyes.

"I'm not joking," Chris said seriously.

"But-but how is she alive?" Shane asked.

"How about I bring her out here, and then we can explain?"

"Please do," Vince said, wrapping a supportive arm around Linda.

Chris jogged back to the house and caught Stephanie staring at the pictures on top of the fireplace.  He walked over to her and lightly tapped her on the shoulder.  She jumped slightly before turning her eyes to him.

"Sorry I scared you."

"No, it's ok, did you tell them?"

"Yeah, they want to see you."

"Let's go," she said instinctively taking his hand in hers.  Chris looked down surprised at their clasped hands, but didn't bother saying anything about it.

They walked out into the backyard, and everyone gasped.  Tears fell down Linda's face as she saw her daughter for the first time in two years.  Vince and Shane's jaws dropped as they saw Stephanie, and Vince pulled Linda closer into his embrace.  Regan saw her, and ran over.

"Emma!" Regan cried, and stopped in front of her.  Stephanie kneeled down to her level.

"Hey there Regan," Stephanie said, hugging the little girl.

"You come for my birthday?"

"Yeah, I did, do you mind if I stay here?"

"Stay!"

"Ok," she said smiling before standing up again.

"Oh my God, Stephanie," Linda said getting up and hugging Stephanie.

"Hi, you must be Linda," Stephanie said returning the hug.  Linda pulled away and looked at Stephanie confused.

"Stephanie, what are you talking about?"

"She has amnesia," Chris filled in for them.

"Amnesia?"

"Yeah, I do."

"How did that happen?  How is Stephanie alive?" Vince asked.

"Let's sit down," Chris said, letting everyone sit down before continuing, "Stephanie was never in the plane that crashed.  She was attacked before she could get there."

"But they found your identification and your things."

"We figure that they took my things, and got on the plane themselves.  I was in a coma for a couple of days, and when I came out of it, I had amnesia."

"But how did you find her?" Shane asked.

"Like I said I was at the beach, and she showed up."

"And you didn't tell us?" Vince said.

"He didn't want to get your hopes up," Stephanie said, "I told him that we should just leave me dead, because I couldn't remember.  And that we should go our separate ways, and pretend like he had never found me.  But I couldn't stay away, I found myself thinking about him and Regan, and I knew I had to come back."

"And you can't remember anything?" Shane questioned.

"After Chris left, I started getting these flashes of memories, so I'm hoping that eventually it will come back, but as of now, I can't remember all that much."

"My poor baby," Linda said, going over to Stephanie again, and hugging her.

"I'm glad you're alive Stephanie," Shane added.

"Thank you, Shane, I've seen you on television, you're very good at what you do."

"Thanks," Shane answered, just happy that Stephanie was back, memory or no memory.

"And Vince—"

"You can call me Dad," Vince put in.

"Dad," Stephanie complied, "Your character is extremely ruthless, I hope you aren't like that in real life."

"No, no I'm not," Vince said smiling at his little girl.

"So what are we going to do now?" Shane asked them all.

"What do you mean?" Chris said.

"Well, what happens now?"

"Um, I'd like to try to go back to my old life," Stephanie told them all, "If that's ok with all of you?"

"You mean, like your old job and things like that?" Shane said.

"Well, as close as I can without, you know, interfering or anything."

"We'll definitely see if you can fit back into the company," Vince told her.

"Thank you, I'd like that," Stephanie said smiling.

"We can re-introduce you to the roster at the next show on Monday, we can hold off bringing you on television for a while."

"Television, I would get to be on TV?" Stephanie asked in amazement.

"Yes, eventually."

"Wow."

"So, we'll see how it goes."

~Later that evening~

Chris was cleaning up some plates and things as Stephanie and Regan sat watching wrestling tapes in the living room.  He could hear their laughter, and he had never heard a more wonderful sound then his daughter and wife laughing as they watched TV.

He never thought he would ever get to hear that sound, but hear it he did, and it warmed his heart.  Her family had been completely in shock since Stephanie's arrival, and Stephanie had been so kind and nice, trying to get to know them again, trying to remember.  

He walked into the living room, and Stephanie looked up at him and smiled.  He found himself smiling back, before plopping himself down on the couch next to Regan.  He saw they were watching an old Raw from when him and Stephanie had been "business partners."

"Princess, it's almost time for bed," Chris told the little girl.

"But Daddy, I wanna watch wefwing," she whined.

"You can watch wrestling tomorrow, I promise, now let's get ready for bed," he said, picking her up.

"Can I help?" Stephanie asked. 

Chris looked at her for a second, "Sure."

Stephanie smiled before getting up.  They took Regan upstairs, and got her ready for bed.  He saw that the smile on Stephanie's face never seemed to wane, only growing brighter and brighter each second.  And it fueled his own bright smile.  It was like a dream come true, him and Stephanie putting their daughter to bed.  He almost wanted to cry tears of happiness.

"Good night Princess, I love you," Chris said leaning over to kiss her forehead.

"Night Daddy, I love you," Regan said.

"Good night Regan," Stephanie said to the little girl.

"G'night Emma," Regan said smiling.

"You can call me Stephanie," she said.

"Kay, Stephanie.  Night."

Chris and Stephanie left the room, but not before Stephanie looked back one more time at Regan.  She smiled as she thought that that little girl was actually hers.

They went downstairs, and sat on the couch opposite each other.  They both knew that they had to discuss some things, and there was no better time then the present.  

"She can call you Mommy if you want her to call you that," Chris told her.

"I don't want to impose or anything."

"You're her mother, it wouldn't be imposing."

"I don't know, I guess I kind of feel like I'm intruding or something," Stephanie said, looking down.

"You can't intrude on your own life.  You'll get back into the swing of things, I promise."

"Thank you, I think I needed to hear that.  I was wondering something………" she said, her voice fading.

"Yeah?"

"Do you have any like home videos of me that I can watch?  Like our wedding, do you have our wedding on tape?"

"Yes, of course I do, it was only one of the best days of our lives, hold on," Chris said, before getting up and going over to a shelf full of tapes.  He pulled one out and popped it in the VCR.

"Thanks," she said, gratefully, wanting to find out about her previous life.

"Not a problem, sit back and enjoy," he said, as she started laughing.

The movie came to life, and they both watched in silence as the tape replayed their wedding.  Stephanie sat engrossed as she watched herself on screen, wanting desperately to remember what was probably one of the best days of her life.  Chris kept looking over at Stephanie trying to decipher her emotions.

As the tape ended, Stephanie wiped away a solitary tear that fell from her eye.  Her wedding had been so beautiful.  And the vows that they had said were so heartfelt and tender.  She hated not being able to remember, having to rely on video tapes to tell her what her wedding was like.

"Stephanie, are you ok?"

"Um, yeah, it's just that was such a beautiful wedding.  Your vows were so moving."

"Thanks," he said smiling.

"I wish so much that I could remember it," Stephanie said before yawning.

"You must be exhausted, let me show you to the guest room," Chris said, getting off the couch.

"Yeah, I am a little tired, lead the way," Stephanie said, getting off the couch as well.  Chris led her upstairs, and showed her to one of the guest rooms.  He didn't want to seem forward and invite her back to their bed, even though they were married.

"Here we go," Chris said opening the door, "There's a bathroom right through there."

"Great, thanks."

"No problem.  If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask, my room is down the hallway."

"Ok, goodnight," Stephanie said, leaning up and kissing him on the cheek.  Chris was surprised by her actions, but didn't want to question her just yet.

He smiled and said, "Goodnight to you, sleep well………Oh, and Stephanie?"

"Yeah?"

"Welcome home."

Chris left her then, and walked back to his room.  Today, Stephanie had held hands with him, and kissed him on the cheek.  Maybe it was just second nature for her to do that, her instincts kicking in when she was around him.  He would have to see how that developed.

Stephanie got ready for bed, and snuggled underneath the warm covers.  For the first time in a long time, she felt really truly safe.  She fell asleep thinking about how at home she felt here, even though technically it was her home, but she loved the feeling she got while she was here.  She fell asleep thinking about that.

Stephanie woke up later, and noticed it was still dark outside.  She got up from the bed, suddenly feeling the urge to watch some more videos and try to unlock the secrets to her past.  She walked down the hallway when she noticed that Chris's door was slightly ajar.

Curiosity getting the best of her, she quietly walked up to his door, and gently pushed it aside.  She saw him in the dim light coming from the hallway.  She couldn't take her eyes off of him, wanting nothing more than to climb in next to him.  His face was so angelic in sleep, and she wanted to run her hands through the golden locks that were splayed across his pillow.

She shook those thoughts from her head, and backed out of the room.  Deciding that sleep would be better, she went back to her room and climbed back into bed.  She lay there thinking about Chris for a while before drifting off to sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

Chris woke up the next morning, and smiled to himself as he realized who was sleeping just down the hallway from him. Stephanie was back where she belonged, at home with him and Regan. They could finally be a family again. Even if Stephanie had no memory, they were still a family.  
  
Chris got up and went to Regan's room to wake her up. They had to make an early start this morning, because they had a flight to catch to go to the next show. They had all decided yesterday that Stephanie would come with them, and they would announce her presence before the show tomorrow.  
  
He opened the door, and found the bed empty. That was odd, usually Regan would stay in bed, or in her room waiting for him to come and wake her up to make breakfast. He didn't want to start panicking, but he didn't like the idea of Regan wandering around the house alone. He started walking towards Stephanie's room, when he heard the sound of laughter coming from downstairs.  
  
Chris went down the stairs, and followed the laughter into the kitchen. He found Regan sitting at the kitchen table, eating a stack of pancakes, and Stephanie standing over the stove, apparently making eggs.  
  
"Chris, good morning," Stephanie said as she spotted him.  
  
"Mornin Daddy," Regan said, between bites.  
  
"Morning, you made breakfast?" Chris asked.  
  
"Yeah, I hope you don't mind, I got up early, and just had the urge to make breakfast."  
  
"Wow, of course I don't mind."  
  
"Sit down, and I'll serve you."  
  
"Mama made pancakes," Regan said as he sat down.  
  
"Mama?"  
  
"I hope it's ok that I told her she can call me that?"  
  
"Yeah, sure, of course it is," Chris said, still shocked by Stephanie making breakfast and doing all this other stuff for them, "You're her mother."  
  
"Here's your breakfast," she said, setting a plate down in front of him.  
  
"This is great," Chris said, digging in.  
  
"Did I ever make breakfast before?"  
  
"Um, no, you were a pretty bad cook," Chris said sheepishly.  
  
"Oh, well, luckily I improved in that department, huh?" she said laughing.  
  
"Yeah," Chris said dumbly.  
  
"So what's the plan for today?"  
  
"We have to fly to Detroit for the show tomorrow, and that's about it for today."  
  
"Great, sounds like fun."  
  
"Yeah, fun," Regan echoed, smiling, a mouth full of food. Chris laughed at her.  
  
"Why don't you sit down and join us?" Chris told Stephanie.  
  
"Oh, let me just finish this up," she said.  
  
"Ok. How did you sleep last night?"  
  
"I slept well, thank you. So what time are we leaving?" she said, as she too sat down at the table.  
  
"2:00, and we have to keep you secret until tomorrow."  
  
"Sounds like some sort of undercover mission," she said laughing.  
  
"I guess it does," Chris said smiling at her.  
  
******************  
  
They got to their hotel room after their flight into Detroit, and Stephanie collapsed on the bed as soon as she walked in. Chris looked at her and laughed as she lay sprawled on the bed. She opened her eyes and looked up at him.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Tired?"  
  
"It's been a long day, I'm not used to flying so much."  
  
"You get used to it after a while, and you better be prepared for tomorrow, that's when everyone finds out."  
  
"I know. I'm kind of nervous."  
  
"Don't be, it'll be fine."  
  
"Daddy, where toys?" Regan asked as she looked around the room. Chris brought out a bag, and opened it to reveal all of Regan's toys that she brought with her. Most of them being wrestling action figures.  
  
"Mama, play," Regan said as she sat on the ground and started playing with the figures.  
  
"Ok Regan, I'll play with you," Stephanie said as she moved to sit on the floor and play with her daughter.  
  
"I'm going to take a shower ok?" Chris said. Stephanie nodded.  
  
Chris smiled at his wife and daughter sitting on the floor playing before disappearing into the bathroom. He thought it might be awkward with Stephanie around again, it had just been him and Regan for a long time. But Stephanie was fitting right in.  
  
"So Regan, who's your favorite wrestler?" Stephanie asked, wanting to know more about her daughter.  
  
"Kurt," Regan answered simply, not even having to think about it.  
  
"You like Kurt?"  
  
"He gives me presents, and sits with me when Daddy wrestles, and he lets me wear his medals," Regan explained, smiling happily.  
  
"Do you like wrestling?"  
  
"Yes, Daddy's moves are Walls and Lionsault," Regan said proudly.  
  
"Wow, you sure know a lot about it."  
  
"Daddy teach me, and Gampa Vince."  
  
Stephanie sat playing with Regan before she heard a knock on the door. She looked startled for a moment, not knowing who it might be.  
  
"Regan, stay here, Mommy's going to see who's at the door ok?"  
  
"Kay Mama," Regan said, not looking up.  
  
Stephanie got up and went to the door. She peeked through the peephole, and saw Kurt Angle standing out there, she recognized him from the television. She wanted to open the door, but they were trying to keep Stephanie a secret so she couldn't. She heard Kurt knock again, and went to tell Chris so he could open it.  
  
She walked up to the bathroom door and knocked loudly. It took a few seconds, but Chris answered the door, clad in a towel. Stephanie couldn't help but notice how nice he looked.  
  
"Chris?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Kurt Angle's at the door."  
  
"Did you answer it?"  
  
"No, that's why I came to tell you, you can answer it."  
  
"I'm kinda busy," he said laughing.  
  
"I can see that, but he's just standing outside."  
  
"Ok, hold on," he said, as he closed the door, and reemerged with pants on.  
  
"Wait in here," he told her. She nodded mutely going into the bathroom.  
  
Chris closed the door behind him and walked over to the hotel room door. He looked through the peephole checking to see if Kurt was still there. Once he saw he was still out there he opened the door.  
  
"Hey Kurt."  
  
"Hey Chris, I heard that you were here so I decided to see if you wanted to join me for dinner," Kurt said walking into the hotel room, even though Chris hadn't invited him in.  
  
"Actually I was probably going to eat in with Regan."  
  
"Oh ok, that's fine. So where's the little girl?"  
  
"She's playing over there," Chris said nodding his head in Regan's direction.  
  
"Were you taking a shower?" Kurt asked, noticing Chris's wet hair.  
  
"Yeah, why?"  
  
"Who was looking after Regan?" Kurt said going over to the little girl.  
  
"Kurt!" Regan yelled when she saw him, "I miss you!"  
  
She ran over to him and opened her arms signaling that she wanted a hug. Kurt bent down and hugged the little girl.  
  
"I missed you too doll."  
  
"Come play!" Regan cried happily.  
  
"Ok, cutie," he said sitting down on the ground, "Really Chris, you shouldn't leave a three-year old alone, you're not using one of the three I's, where's your intelligence?"  
  
"Um, yeah, I don't know," Chris said dumbly.  
  
"I play with Mama," Regan told Kurt. Chris's eyes grew wide as Regan said that. He couldn't believe Regan had blown their cover.  
  
"Yes, that's your Mama," Kurt said pointing to the Stephanie figure on the ground. Chris breathed a sigh of relief.  
  
"No," Regan said frustrated that Kurt didn't get what she was saying, "Mama in bafroom."  
  
"What?" Kurt said looking from Regan to Chris. Chris just shrugged, acting like he didn't know anything.  
  
"Mama in bafroom," Regan said pointing towards the closed door. Kurt stood up and walked over to Chris.  
  
"Do you have a woman in this room?" Kurt asked discreetly as possible.  
  
"No, of course not," Chris said, hoping he sounded convincing.  
  
"Are you sure?" Kurt asked suspiciously.  
  
"Yeah," Chris said, shrugging the comment off.  
  
"I show you," Regan said getting up. She grabbed Kurt's hand and dragged him over to the bathroom, "Mama there."  
  
Kurt opened the bathroom door and saw...nothing.  
  
"Sweetie, there's nothing in here," Kurt said looking down at Regan.  
  
Chris walked over and looked as well, and it was true, he couldn't see Stephanie anywhere. She was really good at hiding. Kurt looked over at Chris, as Regan let go of his hand and walked into the bathroom.  
  
"Is she ok?" Kurt whispered.  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"She thinks Stephanie's here, that's not normal."  
  
"She's fine, she's just excited. We were talking about Stephanie yesterday, and maybe she just has an imaginary friend." Kurt looked at him with narrowed eyes.  
  
Meanwhile, inside the bathroom Regan had decided to find Stephanie herself. She looked everywhere, and finally spotted Stephanie against the shower wall, away from where Kurt could see her. Regan's eyes lit up, and Stephanie motioned for her to be quiet. But like most three year olds, that's next to impossible.  
  
"Kurt!" Regan yelled.  
  
"What cutie?" Kurt said, worried about the youngster.  
  
"Mama!" she yelled, pointing at Stephanie.  
  
Kurt walked into the bathroom, ready to play along with Regan. Maybe Chris had been right, and it was an imaginary friend. He walked to where Regan was standing and looked to where she was pointing.  
  
Kurt's eyes became as big as saucers as he saw who was standing against the shower wall. He thought that his eyes were deceiving him, and he blinked a few times. He still couldn't believe what he was seeing. Stephanie was standing in the bathroom. Stephanie was ALIVE and standing in the bathroom.  
  
"Stephanie!"  
  
"Hi, yeah, you're Kurt Angle," Stephanie said, stepping out of the shower. By this time Chris had come inside as well, and stood watching the exchange.  
  
"You're here! You're ALIVE!" Kurt said, his eyes not leaving Stephanie, "Did you know she was alive Chris?"  
  
"She was in my bathroom, so yeah I knew she was alive," Chris said.  
  
"But-but how, and when, and why, how, what are you doing here?" Kurt said, stumbling over his words.  
  
"Do you need to sit down?" Stephanie told him. Kurt nodded, and Stephanie started to walk into the main room, but before she could leave Kurt grabbed her and hugged her tightly.  
  
"Um, hi," Stephanie managed to say.  
  
"Ok, explain," Kurt returned. He let go of her, and they all walked out into the main room. Kurt sat on the couch, while Chris and Stephanie sat perched on the bed.  
  
"I told you," Regan said before Kurt pulled her into his lap. Kurt kissed her forehead, and Regan giggled.  
  
"Just like your parents. So care to explain how Stephanie came back from the dead?"  
  
"She wasn't in any plane crash Kurt, she was attacked, got amnesia, and she and I happened to meet by coincidence. She couldn't remember me, and I left her, but she decided to come back to try to remember," Chris said quickly.  
  
"Well, you made that all seem so quaint and nice," Kurt said smiling.  
  
"I try," Chris grinned.  
  
"So you can't remember anything?" Kurt asked turning to Stephanie.  
  
"Um, a little, but not much," Stephanie answered.  
  
"I never thought I'd see you again," Kurt said to Stephanie.  
  
"That's what you get for thinking Kurt," Chris said.  
  
"Shut up Jericho," Kurt said jokingly, "So who knows about all of this?"  
  
"Her family."  
  
"That's it?"  
  
"Well, we're going to tell everyone in the company tomorrow," Chris said.  
  
"They're going to be so shocked. I mean, I'm still shocked."  
  
"Hell, I'm still shocked," Chris said laughing.  
  
"So you guys must have a lot to do, like make sure Stephanie isn't legally dead anymore and stuff."  
  
"Yeah, but we're trying to enjoy the fact Stephanie's alive," Chris said.  
  
"Ok, well I guess I'll leave you guys then."  
  
"Kurt, no go!" Regan said loudly clinging to him.  
  
"Aww, cutie, I'll see you tomorrow, and then I'll let you wear my medals ok?" Kurt said calmly.  
  
"Kay!" Regan said jubilantly, before Kurt put her down.  
  
"I'm really glad you're back Stephanie," Kurt said, giving her another hug.  
  
"Thank you Kurt, that means a lot, I'm sure we'll get to be good friends again."  
  
"Absolutely." And with that Kurt left. Stephanie turned to Chris.  
  
"Do you think everyone's reactions are going to be like that?"  
  
"Probably, why?"  
  
"Just want to prepare myself." 


	15. Chapter 15

~The next day~  
  
Stephanie and Chris were getting ready to go to the arena. Vince had called and said that they should arrive early so that they wouldn't be seen before it was time to tell everyone. He was also having a car pick them up so that they didn't have to drive everywhere. Stephanie had already realized that Vince was trying to compensate for lost time, and was spoiling her rotten.  
  
"I'm a little bit nervous about today," she said.  
  
"Don't be. I promise everything will be fine."  
  
"Are you sure? I mean, did people like me?"  
  
"Everyone liked you, they couldn't help but like you. You were a great person, and as far as I can tell, you still are."  
  
"Thanks," Stephanie said blushing at his comment.  
  
"Where we go?" Regan asked  
  
"We're going to the show," Stephanie explained.  
  
"Yay, wefwing!"  
  
They got their things ready and they left for the arena. Stephanie didn't know what was in store for her. She hadn't been to a show in two years, and she didn't even remember going to them before then. Everything was a mystery to her, and she didn't know if she would fit in with these people.  
  
She knew Chris was happy she was alive and had come back. He had told her that he hadn't seen anyone in the two years she was gone. Oddly enough, though she couldn't remember she was married, Stephanie had never gone out with anyone either, not that many guys hadn't asked her, she just didn't feel right going out with anyone. She figured it was because her heart knew that Chris was somewhere out there, loving her, and she could never betray him.  
  
What if she hadn't come back to try to remember? Would she be better off in the long run? Maybe she should've stayed dead, who knew if people would even want her alive again. But then she looked at Chris and Regan. Chris was tickling Regan and the child was laughing hysterically. No, it was better that she had come back, if only for them. But negative thoughts kept flowing through her brain.  
  
Chris looked up from horsing around with Regan, and saw Stephanie staring blankly out the window. She looked so sad, and forlorn, and Chris wondered what was up with her. Ever since they had gotten in the car, she had seemed somewhat withdrawn.  
  
He put Regan down on the seat and moved over to where Stephanie was sitting. He put his arm around her tentatively, not knowing if he could even give her comfort. To his surprise, but also relief, she scooted over on the seat, and rested her head on his shoulder.  
  
"Stephanie, what's the matter?" Chris whispered softly.  
  
"Nothing," she whispered back.  
  
"I know that's not true, you don't remember, but I do know you better than anyone, so you might as well tell me what it really is."  
  
"I just- I was wondering if I was better off not found."  
  
"Why would you wonder that, that's not true, we're better off now?"  
  
"But will people even still care, everyone's probably forgotten about me, they won't even remember me."  
  
"How could anyone forget you, you're Stephanie McMahon-Jericho."  
  
"Yes, but what if nobody cares?"  
  
"You may not remember, but everyone remembers you Stephanie, and they all cared about you."  
  
"But it seems like everyone's fine, and they don't need me...even you. I mean, look at you, you've raised Regan all by yourself, and you seemed happy, and now I'm back and I've thrown everything off. Maybe you're better off without me."  
  
"Don't ever say that," Chris said seriously, looking down at her, "I will NEVER be better off without you ok, never. I was miserable for two years without you. Regan was the only reason I was happy, because in the back of my mind you were always lingering. I loved you Stephanie, I loved you more than anything. I was nothing without you Stephanie, nothing."  
  
"You mean that?"  
  
"Of course I mean that, there has never been any one thing I've wanted more in my life than you Stephanie. Without you I was incomplete," Chris said, a little sheepishly, not meaning to show her so much feeling.  
  
"Thank you for reassuring me," she said leaning up to kiss his cheek. She did that a lot Chris realized, maybe she was in love with him after all.  
  
"It's ok."  
  
They arrived at the arena, and snuck Stephanie in as best they could. They walked into their private dressing room, and hung around until the meeting was scheduled to begin. Stephanie was pacing around nervously, unsure of what would happen. Chris and Regan sat watching her walk back and forth.  
  
"I think I'm ready," Stephanie said.  
  
"Then lets go, and shock everyone," Chris said getting up, and taking Regan's hand.  
  
"Deep breaths, deep breaths," Stephanie said silently to herself. Chris turned to her, stopping her.  
  
"Everything is going to be fine," he whispered, and before he could stop himself, he leaned in and kissed her gently. She kissed him back before he pulled away.  
  
"I hope so," she said smiling softly at him. She liked him kissing her, she might have to get more of those.  
  
They all walked down the hallway to where they knew the meeting was being held. It had already started, but Vince said they could wait a while before going inside. He wanted to tell everyone before he just brought Stephanie in.  
  
"Now, I've got some fantastic news," Vince told everyone, "We have a new person joining the roster."  
  
Everyone started buzzing about whom it could be. Well, everyone except Kurt who already knew. But he was keeping his mouth shut. No one could think of anyone who had signed.  
  
"Actually, this person used to be on the roster, but now their back," Vince said, only confusing everybody even more.  
  
"The other day, I received some very shocking, but very happy news. Someone who I thought I would never see again came back. And they're here today, and I hope that you make them feel welcome. Everyone please welcome back...Stephanie McMahon-Jericho."  
  
Everyone gasped as Stephanie walked nervously into the room, her hand clutching Chris's. Everyone gasped as they saw Stephanie, alive and, well, alive. Most people got out of their seats and rushed to her.  
  
Stephanie was enveloped in a hug by HHH, whom she had become friends when they had the marriage storyline. And after that, most everyone hugged her, and told her how happy they were to see her. Stephanie smiled, recognizing most of them from the television, but not telling anyone about her condition.  
  
"How are you alive?" Lita asked as everyone sat down again. Stephanie looked at Chris for a moment, and he nodded at her, silently telling her to proceed.  
  
"I was never in a plane crash. I was attacked before I could get there. Chris found me a few weeks ago, but you see, I have amnesia," everyone seemed surprised, "We decided not to let anyone know, and to go our separate ways, but I decided to come back. I'm sorry I can't remember you all, but I hope that you'll accept me as I am now," Stephanie answered.  
  
"Stephanie is trying to get her old life back, so she'll be back on the creative team on a probationary trial," Vince told everyone, "Now we have a show to do, so let's get ready."  
  
Everyone started filing out, some of them hugging Stephanie again. Stephanie smiled the whole time. Without knowing it, she had missed being in the company.  
  
Stephanie sat in the dressing room later, watching as Chris was on screen doing an interview. She smiled as she watched, seeing him at work was really fun. She couldn't help but think that he looked really gorgeous with his hair tied back like it was. As each second went by, she found herself more attracted to him. It might be her old feelings resurfacing, or she might just be falling in love with him all over again.  
  
He had been so nice to her since she came back. She knew that he was still in love with her, or at least the former persona of her. But he still was so kind, and made sure that she was never in over her head. How could she help but fall for him?  
  
Chris walked back to his locker room, and saw Stephanie watching as they filmed some other backstage segments. He smiled and sat down next to her. She looked over briefly to send him a grin, then went back to watching.  
  
"So where's Regan?" she asked.  
  
"Oh, she's off with Kurt, that's usually where she is during the shows."  
  
"Oh, he seems like a nice guy."  
  
"Yeah, he was your best friend, you know, before."  
  
"I figured that," she said laughing.  
  
"Just reminding you."  
  
"I'm going to go get a water," she said, getting up, "Did you want me to get you anything?"  
  
"No, thanks. Do you know where catering is?"  
  
"I'll find it."  
  
Stephanie left the room, and started walking to her right, hoping she was going in the right direction. She looked over her shoulder just to make sure it wasn't the other way, and smacked right into someone. She turned and saw she had run straight into Rob Van Dam.  
  
"Sorry," she told him.  
  
"It's ok. It's nice to see you're back Steph," Rob said smiling.  
  
"Thanks, I guess it's glad to be back."  
  
"So you can't remember anything?"  
  
"No, not so much."  
  
"That must suck big time."  
  
"It did at first, but now I'm getting stuff back slowly but surely."  
  
Chris thought for a moment, then decided that he would go find Stephanie, and go to catering with her. He walked outside and saw Stephanie talking with RVD just down the hallway. He felt a pang of jealousy go through him as he saw Stephanie smiling at the other man.  
  
"I love your moves in the ring," Stephanie told him, smiling.  
  
"You watched."  
  
"Well, I have for the past couple of weeks. You can't help noticing your moves, they're so unique."  
  
"I know," Rob said, tying his hair back as he prepared for his match.  
  
"Oops, you forgot a strand," she said, grabbing a strand of hair that was hanging out.  
  
"Thanks," he said smiling.  
  
Chris stood there silently, frozen to his spot. He couldn't move even if he wanted to. His eyes were riveted to the scene playing out before him. Stephanie laughing and tucking RVD's hair behind his ear. She seemed to be happy talking to him, and she was obviously comfortable talking to him. It was then that reality hit him.  
  
Even if he could remember loving her, Stephanie couldn't remember loving him, and that meant she could fall in love with someone else. 


	16. Chapter 16

Over the next couple weeks, Stephanie began to feel right at home at the shows. She had gotten used to the traveling that they had to do all the time. She had also joined the writing team, where Chris had told her she worked before. She fell into step easily with them, and had been working hard.  
  
She had also fallen into a routine at home as well. She and Chris got along so well, and he was definitely her best friend. She also found herself more and more attracted to him as the days passed. He hadn't kissed her since the day she had re-joined WWE, and she was slightly disappointed by that. Maybe she could do something to show him it was ok if he wanted to kiss her.  
  
She had no trouble making friends either, everyone was so nice, and accepted her. They tried to make her feel right at home in the company. Everyone tried to include her, and remind her of what she once was.  
  
"Hey Chris," Stephanie said as she walked into their dressing room.  
  
"Hey Stephanie, where have you been?" he asked grinning.  
  
"Oh, I just had a meeting, and then I was talking to Rob for a while."  
  
"Oh, were you?" Chris said, his voice controlled, trying to stifle the sarcasm in his voice.  
  
"Yeah, he's such a funny guy don't you think?"  
  
"Yeah, he's a real great guy."  
  
"I think so too. So are you ready for tonight?"  
  
"Yeah, I have a match against Eddy Guerrero tonight."  
  
"Sounds like fun, I'm sure you'll be great."  
  
"You think?"  
  
"I know. I've seen you in action, you're one of the best. At least in my opinion."  
  
"Thanks, that means a lot," Chris said sincerely, "Oh, I was going to meet with Eddy before the match, so I'm going to go over there. And Regan is with your dad so I'm going to go get her too."  
  
"Ok, bring her back here, I'll watch her while you're with Eddy."  
  
"Ok, bye," Chris said, turning to leave.  
  
"Hey wait," Stephanie said walking over to him.  
  
"What?"  
  
"See you later," she said kissing his cheek.  
  
"Yeah, bye."  
  
Stephanie went and sat on the couch after he left. She couldn't understand why Chris didn't respond to anything she did. Was he not attracted to her, but he had been married to her, and for all intents and purposes, still was. Was she different from how she used to be so much, that he didn't like her anymore?  
  
Maybe she needed to do something romantic for him to get a clue. Maybe they could go out on a date or something. Anything to get him to notice her. Now, she just had to find someone to baby-sit Regan, so that her and Chris could have a night alone. She got off the couch and left the room hoping to find someone who could baby-sit for tomorrow night.  
  
First she went to her father's office. She had been spending a lot of time with her family, and she felt pretty comfortable around them. It was weird not being able to recall anything about your own family, but they still treated her as if she did have a memory. She was glad that she could bond with them, despite her lack of memory.  
  
"Knock, knock," Stephanie said to the slightly ajar door.  
  
"Stephanie, come in," Vince said, as Stephanie walked in. Regan was sitting on the desk watching while Vince worked.  
  
"Hi Mama," Regan said happily.  
  
"Hey there sweetie, what are you doing?"  
  
"Watching Gampa work."  
  
"Was there something you wanted Stephanie?"  
  
"Yes, Dad, I was wondering if you were busy tomorrow night?"  
  
"I'm sorry Princess, but I have my weekly meeting with JR about the talent. Why do you ask?"  
  
"Oh, I just wanted to go out with Chris, and needed someone to baby-sit."  
  
"Again, I'm sorry."  
  
"It's ok, I'm sure I'll find someone else. Don't tell him though I want it to be a surprise. Thanks anyway. Regan did you want to come with me, or you can wait for Daddy?"  
  
"I come with you," Regan said, letting Vince help her off the desk. She ran to Stephanie, and grabbed her hand.  
  
"Bye Dad," Stephanie said as she and Regan walked out.  
  
"Bye Stephanie, bye Regan."  
  
They walked down the hallway, and Stephanie saw Kurt standing by the gorilla, and decided to see if he could baby-sit. She knew that Kurt wouldn't mind, he loved Regan as if she were his own daughter.  
  
"Kurt," Stephanie called out. Kurt turned to her and smiled.  
  
"Stephanie, hey, what's up?" he said as he walked over.  
  
"Um, I was wondering if you wanted to baby-sit for this adorable little girl tomorrow night after the show?" Stephanie said persuasively.  
  
"I would really love to Stephanie, really, but I'm catching the red eye to go home, it's my mom's birthday."  
  
"Oh, no it's ok, Kurt, I understand."  
  
"I'm really sorry Steph."  
  
"Don't apologize, I'm sure there's someone who has no life and can baby- sit," Stephanie said laughing, "Come on Regan."  
  
"I stay with Kurt?" Regan asked.  
  
"Um, Kurt is it ok if Regan hangs out with you for a while?"  
  
"Yeah, sure, come on little girl," Kurt said taking Regan's hand.  
  
"I'll see you later," Stephanie said bending to kiss Regan.  
  
Stephanie walked back to her locker room, and she ran into RVD. She decided to ask him and see if he could possibly baby-sit. He had been a really good friend the past couple of weeks, and the only person she felt like she could open up to about her feelings for Chris.  
  
"Rob," Stephanie said grinning.  
  
"Steph, how are you?"  
  
"I'm great, I was wondering if you would do me a really huge favor."  
  
"Depends on what it is," Rob said laughing.  
  
"Nothing like that. I wanted to know if you could baby-sit tomorrow night."  
  
"What for?"  
  
"I want to go out with Chris, just the two of us," Stephanie said smiling.  
  
Chris happened to be walking down the corridor, when he turned the corner and saw Stephanie and RVD talking. He quickly slid back behind the wall, and though he knew he shouldn't, he couldn't help but eavesdrop on their conversation.  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yeah, I want it to be just us together," Stephanie said, dreamily.  
  
"Sounds cool."  
  
"I hope it will be."  
  
"And Chris doesn't have a problem with this?"  
  
"No, why should he?"  
  
"Well, with Regan and everything."  
  
"No, of course not."  
  
"So tomorrow night right?"  
  
"Yeah, tomorrow night after the show."  
  
"Yeah, I can do it. Would it be all night?"  
  
"No, not all night, probably until 1 or 2, but not all night."  
  
"Oh, cause I could do it all night if you wanted."  
  
"No, that's ok, and can you keep it a secret?"  
  
"Ok, cool," Rob said nodding.  
  
"Thank you so much Rob," Stephanie said hugging him.  
  
Chris leaned against the wall, and breathed deeply. It seemed that Stephanie had just made a date with RVD. The love of his life, his wife, had just made a date with another man. Who was he kidding? That wasn't really his Stephanie, she didn't even know she loved him. She was falling for someone else, and his heart broke as he realized he was losing her all over again.  
  
But this time he was losing her to another man. 


	17. Chapter 17

Stephanie walked back to her dressing room after talking to RVD. She smiled as she realized that tomorrow night would be the first time she would actually get to be alone with Chris. She had to make plans for tomorrow, find something nice to wear, and make reservations at a nice restaurant. She was excited.  
  
"Hey, you're back," Stephanie said greeting Chris, who was sitting silently on the couch.  
  
"Yeah, where'd you go?"  
  
"Oh, um, I had to go...talk to my dad," Stephanie said, not wanting to give away the surprise.  
  
"Oh, ok," Chris replied, knowing she was lying to him.  
  
"Regan's with Kurt by the way."  
  
"Oh, ok, that's fine."  
  
"Chris is something wrong?" she asked concerned.  
  
"No, of course not."  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine."  
  
"Ok," Stephanie said, studying him for a moment, "So are you doing anything tomorrow night?"  
  
"No, why?"  
  
"Just wondering, I might do something."  
  
"With who?" Chris asked, though he already knew.  
  
"Oh, with...my dad," Stephanie said, trying to cover up, she wanted to make sure that Chris didn't make plans for tomorrow.  
  
"Oh, that sounds nice."  
  
"Yeah, you know, bonding and stuff like that. I guess he wants to make up for lost time or something."  
  
"I see."  
  
"Yeah, I just wanted to make sure someone was taking care of Regan. So you'll be around?"  
  
"I'll be around."  
  
"Great," she said smiling.  
  
"Yeah, great," Chris said, without emotion.  
  
~Later that evening~  
  
Chris lay awake in bed just thinking. He couldn't believe that Stephanie was going to go out with Rob Van Dam tomorrow. He felt hot jealousy running through him and he was powerless to stop it. Stephanie was supposed to love him, she was supposed to remember what it was like to love him and only him.  
  
She wasn't supposed to come back and fall for one of his colleagues. She was supposed to fall back in love with him. He was the one who had mourned for her for two whole years. He's the one who found her, and told her about her life. He was the one who had taken her back in when she wanted to remember. He was the one who loved her more than he loved himself.  
  
He turned his head and looked at her sleeping in the bed next to his own. She was sleeping peacefully, her hands tucked underneath her head. She had a small smile on her lips, and Chris would've given anything to know what she was dreaming about. Probably about her and RVD and how great their date tomorrow would be.  
  
He wondered what would happen if she fell in love with RVD. She would obviously divorce him, she couldn't even remember him in the first place. They had already gotten all the legal stuff out of the way, so Stephanie was officially still alive, and still married to him, although he didn't know how long that would last. If she fell for Rob, she would leave him, and she wouldn't even have any regrets because she didn't love him anyways.  
  
Chris felt disgust boil up inside him as he thought of Stephanie with another man. Especially when he knew the man. When he had left Stephanie in England, and she hadn't come back, but had been with someone else, he wouldn't have been the wiser. But he had actually considered RVD a friend, and to see her with one of his friends would be like putting him in a vat of boiling water, pure torture. Chris drifted off to sleep thinking of horrible things he wanted to do to RVD.  
  
~The next morning~  
  
"Yeah, so I'd like to make reservations for 9:00," Stephanie said into the phone, "Yes, that would be fine."  
  
Chris walked into the room from taking a shower and saw Stephanie on the phone. She looked at him, and got a panicked look on her face, before turning away. Chris wondered whom she was on the phone with that was causing her to be so antsy.  
  
"Um, yeah, for 2, that's right, thank you bye," Stephanie said quickly before hanging up.  
  
"Who was that?" Chris asked, while drying his hair.  
  
"Um, just downstairs, I was wondering if there was a good coffee shop around here. I love good coffee."  
  
"Oh, I see," Chris said, knowing full well that Stephanie had not been telling him the truth. It was pretty obvious she was making reservations for something, most likely her little date.  
  
"So tonight on the show, you're in the first match, so you should be done by 8:30."  
  
"Ok, cool, thanks for letting me know."  
  
"No problem."  
  
"Still planning to go out with your Dad?" Chris asked, hoping that she would stop lying and just tell him the truth.  
  
"Dad? Oh, yeah, yeah, of course, we're going out to dinner," Stephanie said covering up.  
  
"Hope you have fun."  
  
"Oh, I will."  
  
~At the show~  
  
Stephanie had brought her evening wear to the arena, as well as bringing Chris's so they wouldn't have to go back to their hotel. She wanted to be able to get the most out of this evening. Everything was set up, and she was just waiting for Chris's match to end. She looked at Regan who was sitting on the couch playing with some toys.  
  
"How does Mommy look?" she asked, twirling for her daughter.  
  
She had gone all out, and was dressed in a short red dress. The skirt fell to mid-thigh, and it was pretty low-cut. And it hugged every one of her curves. She was sure Chris would love it. She had also curled her hair, then pulled it back loosely so it fell on her shoulders.  
  
"Mama, you look pretty," Regan said approvingly.  
  
"Do you think Daddy will like it?"  
  
"Uh-huh," she nodded. Stephanie went over and kissed Regan on the forehead, wiping off the lipstick she had left there.  
  
"Thank you baby, now let's go, because guess who you get to spend the night with?"  
  
"Kurt?" Regan said, her eyes widening hopefully.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry Regan, Kurt had to go visit his Mommy, but you get to go with Rob."  
  
"Ok."  
  
"Ok, take my hand," Stephanie said, helping the little girl off the couch.  
  
Stephanie grabbed Regan's things and together they left the room. They walked to RVD's dressing room, and Stephanie knocked on the door waiting for him to answer. He finally opened it and let them come inside.  
  
"Hey there Regan."  
  
"Hi Rob," she said politely.  
  
"Here are her things, she should have her pajamas, toys, toiletries, and everything else she needs in there." Stephanie handed him Regan's bag.  
  
"Cool."  
  
"We'll be by around midnight, I got Chris's match on early so we could leave."  
  
"Ok, sounds good. We'll have a great time won't we Regan?"  
  
"Yeah!" she yelled enthusiastically.  
  
"Ok, I love you," Stephanie told Regan, "I'll see you later Rob, and thanks again."  
  
"It's cool, and go have fun. And you look great too."  
  
"I will, bye. Thanks."  
  
Stephanie blew a kiss to Regan, and walked back to her dressing room. She sat waiting for Chris, once she saw that his match had ended. The door opened and Chris walked in, sweaty and tired from his match. He hadn't had the best match, his mind on Stephanie and RVD the whole time. Stephanie stood up to greet him, smoothing out her dress.  
  
He froze when he saw her. She looked so beautiful, and Chris's breath caught as he gave her the once over. The dress she was wearing made her look spectacular, and the smile she had on her face, it made her look even better. Chris felt horrible the moment he realized it wasn't for him.  
  
"Hey you."  
  
"Hey, you look...great."  
  
"Thank you," she said grinning at him.  
  
"Kind of dressed up to go out with your dad, don't you think?" Chris said, gritting his teeth.  
  
"Actually, I'm not going out with Vin-my Dad," she said correcting herself, having to remember that Vince was her father.  
  
"I know," Chris said, wanting her to know that he knew the truth. Stephanie looked at him in surprise.  
  
"You knew?"  
  
"I've known all along."  
  
"Really?" Stephanie said disappointed that her plan had failed.  
  
"Yeah, I don't know why you couldn't just tell me," Chris said, a bit angry.  
  
"Well, I wanted it to be a surprise," she explained.  
  
"Well, it was when I found out. So shouldn't you be going?"  
  
"Um, no, I'm waiting on you."  
  
"Why, you don't have to ask my permission, you can go out with whomever you want," Chris said turning away before she could see the agony in his eyes.  
  
"What?" Stephanie asked confused, "Who am I going out with?"  
  
"Rob Van Dam, I saw you make the date Stephanie, go ahead, I'll take care of Regan while you go out, where is she?"  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"I saw you ask Rob Van Dam out Stephanie, you don't have to lie anymore, ok? I understand," Chris said, gathering up his things as quickly as possible.  
  
Stephanie grabbed his arm, "You've got it all wrong."  
  
"Where's Regan?" Chris asked, ignoring what she said, just wanting to get Regan, and get as far away from here as possible. He never should've gotten his hopes up, how could Stephanie love him, if she couldn't even remember him?  
  
"She's with Rob," Stephanie explained, confused by Chris's behavior.  
  
"What!?!" Chris asked, fuming, "You're taking my daughter with you, no way, she's coming with me!"  
  
"Chris, I don't understand."  
  
"I'm getting Regan and we're going, see you later," Chris said, as he grabbed his bag and headed towards the door.  
  
"But Chris what about tonight?"  
  
"I didn't say you did I? I said Regan and I. I don't care what you do."  
  
"But why would Regan come tonight?"  
  
"She's not, she's coming back to the hotel with me!"  
  
"But we're going out," Stephanie said.  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"The surprise."  
  
"Yeah, that you're going out with Rob, I got that," Chris said, wanting nothing more than to leave, go to the hotel, and climb under the covers, and sulk.  
  
"I'm not going out with Rob," she explained.  
  
"What? But I heard you ask him out yesterday."  
  
"I wasn't asking him out, I was asking if he could baby-sit Regan. It was you I wanted to go out with."  
  
"Me?" Chris asked surprised. It had been him she wanted to go out with all along?  
  
"Yes! I wanted to go out with you. I haven't even gotten to spend any time alone with you, and I'm supposed to be your wife."  
  
"But I don't have any clothes or anything."  
  
"I brought you clothes," she said grabbing a bag from the floor, "I planned ahead. We have reservations at 9."  
  
"You mean, you were going to surprise me with dinner?"  
  
"Yeah...surprise."  
  
"Oh my God, I'm so sorry, you must think I'm a complete jackass," Chris said apologizing, but part of him joyful that she wanted to go out with him.  
  
"Nah, not a complete one. Apology accepted. Wires just got crossed. But go get dressed or we'll miss our reservation."  
  
"Ok, you know, the old you probably would have ripped my head off if I had thought that" Chris said grinning before going to change.  
  
"I'm not the old Stephanie," Stephanie called out.  
  
They arrived at the restaurant just on time, and sat down. Chris smiled behind his menu, relieved that Stephanie wasn't really interested in RVD. Apparently she was interested in him. It made him glad to know that a little bit of the old Stephanie still lingered, the one that loved him as much as he loved her.  
  
"You look beautiful tonight," Chris told her, setting the menu down.  
  
"Thank you," Stephanie said smiling, "I bought the dress for tonight."  
  
"You really do look fabulous."  
  
"Chris, I'd like to thank you."  
  
"Hmm, for what?"  
  
"For allowing me back into your life. For putting up with me, most of all."  
  
"I don't get it."  
  
"I mean, it must be hard on you, the old Stephanie, she was your wife, and you loved her. I can tell that you loved her a lot, and here I am, and I must disappoint you just a little that I don't exactly feel for you what you feel for me, or who I used to be."  
  
"I'm just glad to have you back, in any form."  
  
"But I really wish that I could be who you want me to be," she said, grasping his hand.  
  
"In time, maybe you will, but we can't rush it. I don't want you to feel more out of place then you already do."  
  
"You're a wonderful man, I hope you know that," Stephanie said seriously, "I can see why Stephanie fell in love with you in the first place.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"Chris, may I ask you something, and you don't have to answer if you're uncomfortable or anything?"  
  
"Sure, go ahead."  
  
"What was it like?" she asked him.  
  
"What was what like?"  
  
"Being without Stephanie." Chris thought for a moment before answering, speaking slowly, remembering how hard it had been for him.  
  
"It was awful. I remember when your dad called me and told me the plane had crashed. It felt as if someone had ripped my heart out of my chest and made me watch as they crushed it to a pulp. And it felt like every day the same thing happened."  
  
"You must have been heartbroken," Stephanie said, hating the sadness she saw in his eyes as he recalled who she once was.  
  
"For the longest time I would hope that you'd come back, but then I'd realize you were gone, and it hurt so much more. I would wake up thinking you were next to me, and then I'd realize that you weren't, or the phone would ring and I would hope against hopes that it was you. I went back on the road a few weeks after the funeral because I couldn't bear to be in the house with all your things."  
  
"I'm sorry," she said, biting her lip.  
  
"It's ok, it hurt, but I had Regan, and she can get me through anything life throws at me."  
  
"She is a wonderful little girl."  
  
"I know."  
  
"Well, let's get off these depressing topics and onto something a little more light-hearted," Stephanie said, giving his hand a squeeze before letting it go.  
  
"Like what?"  
  
"Like did you see Edge trip in the hallway the other day?"  
  
"Yeah, that was hilarious," Chris said laughing.  
  
Later that evening, Chris and Stephanie were walking down the hotel hallway, towards RVD's room. Stephanie took Chris's hand in hers as they were walking. Chris smiled as he looked at their intertwined fingers. They stopped in front of RVD's door, and Stephanie turned to him.  
  
"I had fun tonight."  
  
"Me too."  
  
"Can I confess something to you?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"I think I'm falling for you Chris Jericho," Stephanie said, before she pulled him to her with her hand.  
  
She leaned up and kissed him firmly on the mouth. Chris stood shocked for a moment, before returning the kiss. He let go of her hand and wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her towards him. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and gently ran her fingers through his blond hair. They both pulled away and smiled.  
  
"I've loved you for so long Stephanie, and I'm even in love with who you are now," Chris told her honestly, letting everything he had been holding in go.  
  
"Someday soon, I hope to feel the same way," she told him.  
  
They knocked on the door, and Rob answered letting them inside. Regan was asleep on the bed, and Chris went over to pick her up gently. Stephanie grabbed Regan's bag and they said their goodbyes before walking to their own room.  
  
For the first time in a long time, Chris felt like they were actually a family. 


	18. Chapter 18

A/N:  Thanks so much for all the reviews, they are so great, and I thank you all for sticking with the fic.  

~

"I don't know how you've done this for fourteen years," Stephanie said as she sat down on the plane.

"Well, you've been doing it for a while too."

"Yeah, but I can't remember that, this traveling thing it's so tiring," Stephanie said, leaning her head against the airplane chair.

"You'll get used to it after a while, it just takes some time," he said grabbing her hand.

"I'm sure I will," she said leaning over to kiss him.  He smiled as she pulled away.

"What was that for?"

"Cause you're so cute."

"But I'm cute all the time," he said winking.

"So I'm learning."

Chris smiled as the plane took off.  Things had been going so great for the two of them for the past few weeks.  They were "dating" despite the fact they were legally married.  She hadn't told him she loved him, but he knew that she was slowly falling back in love with him again.

He hadn't felt this happy since before Stephanie had gone on the trip to Europe, there had always been a void left by Stephanie that he couldn't replace.  She was his heart, just as much as Regan was.  They were his girls, and he would do anything for either of them.

"I'm tired," Stephanie said.

"Why don't you try to rest then?"

"Yeah, ok," Stephanie said before leaning on Chris's shoulder.  Chris wrapped an arm around her loosely as she drifted off.

_"Hey Chris, what's up?"_

_"Nothing, um Steph, I was wondering if I could ask you something?"_

_"Of course you can, go right ahead," Stephanie said cheerfully._

_"Are you-Would you like to go to dinner with me sometime?" Chris said, a little bit nervous._

_"Like on a date?"_

_"Yeah, I guess you could say that."_

_"You're asking me on a date?" Stephanie asked surprised._

_"Yeah," Chris said sheepishly._

_"That's so cute.  I didn't even know you had feelings for me."_

_"Oh, so then that's a n—"_

_"It's a yes," Stephanie said, not letting Jericho finish his sentence._

_"So you will?"_

_"Definitely," Stephanie said, kissing him on the cheek, "It'll be fun."_

"Steph, wake up," Chris said, tapping her lightly.

Stephanie opened her eyes slowly, letting herself adjust to the light.  She lifted her head from Chris's shoulder and looked around.  Chris smiled at her, and gently kissed her awake.

"Hmm, what's the matter?" she asked groggily.

"We're about to land," he said softly.

"You mean I slept through the whole flight?"

"Yeah," Chris said smiling.

"Wow, I must have been more tired than I thought."

"I guess so." 

The three of them got off the plane, and to their awaiting car.  They drove home fairly quickly, and settled themselves in.  

Later that evening, Stephanie woke up from a deep slumber.  The house was quiet as everyone was asleep.  She crept downstairs to watch some television, which would hopefully help her fall asleep.

She sat down in front of the television when her eyes landed on a huge shelf of videotapes.  She got up and walked over.  Most of the tapes consisted of wrestling, but she noticed a whole row that had different things on the tapes.  She saw a tape labeled "Regan" and she immediately pulled it out and put it in the VCR.

Images came across her screen and all of them of the little girl that she had loved from the moment she laid eyes on her.  They started off when Regan was a newborn, and she could see herself being the doting new mother, fussing over the baby, while Chris filmed the whole thing.

Then she faded out of the video, the focus instead being on simply Regan as Chris was still behind the camera.  Her eyes were riveted on the little girl, as she watched her grow up with each passing scene.  She had missed so much of her daughter's life.  Stephanie watched as the scene changed again, showing Regan at about a year old, holding onto the couch as she walked slowly.  She noticed that there was a wrestling tape playing in the background and she was on it.

_"Are you going to walk for Daddy?" Chris asked from behind the camera._

_"Yah!" Regan yelled._

_"Walk over here then baby."_

_Regan turned her eyes to the television for a moment, then started walking over to it, releasing the couch.  She took a few steps towards the television, a smile plainly on her lips.  Then she looked back and realized that she wasn't holding onto the couch anymore.  She panicked, and fell right on her backside._

_She started crying and reaching her hands out towards Chris.  Chris put the camera down and went over to Regan, the camera still filming.  He picked her up and started dancing her around the room, trying to calm her down._

_"Mama!" Regan screamed, looking at the television._

_"Shh, shh, it's ok baby, I'm here," Chris said soothingly._

_"Mama!" Regan screamed again._

_"Baby, I know you want Mama, but she can't be here, ok, but I'm here," Chris said, wiping her little tears away.  Regan laid her head down on his shoulder as Chris touched her brown curls._

Stephanie found tears rolling down her cheeks as she watched the scene play out before her.  It broke her heart to see her little girl crying for her and she not being able to be there.  And she recognized the sadness in Chris's eyes immediately.  What had the two of them been through without her?

"I didn't even know it was filming," a voice said.  Stephanie turned to see Chris standing in the doorway.

"I'm so sorry," Stephanie said, wiping the tears off her cheeks.

"It's not your fault."

"But if I had been more careful that day, if I hadn't wanted to take a walk before I caught a cab to the airport, none of this would've happened."

"And then where would you be?" Chris said, sitting down on the couch, "You would've been on that plane, and I would rather lose you for two years, then lose you forever."

"But everything you and Regan have been through, it's my fault, if I had gotten my memory back then you wouldn't have had to go through any of it."

"It made us stronger Stephanie.  It made me realize what was really important in my life."

"It's just watching that, you were heartbroken, and I-I was living like I had no past, like there wasn't anyone waiting for my arrival."

"But you didn't know," Chris said.

"But I should have!  I should have looked, I should have tried harder to find you, to find Regan.  That little girl in that video wanted her Mommy more than anything else, and where was her mother?  Probably shopping for new clothes, or taking a shower, or some other stupid insignificant thing.

"Stephanie, you can't beat yourself up about this.  We managed, we lived, it was hard of course, but we were able to go on."

"Chris, I want you to be honest with me, completely honest, what were the last two years like for you?" Chris thought for a moment.

"I wanted to die at first," Chris started, "I literally wanted to be in a grave more than I wanted to live.  You were everything to me Stephanie, everything.  And when you "died" I wanted nothing more than to die as well.  And then I looked into our daughter's eyes, and I realized that I had something I HAD to live for.  It wasn't just me who was losing you, but it was her as well.  She made me go on, she pushed me to wake up every day, and to remind me to breathe.  And everyone would look at me with these sad little looks of pity and sympathy, and I wanted to punch them all.  They didn't know what I was going through, they couldn't even begin to understand my pain.  But everyday the pain lessened a little, and slowly but surely, I started to heal."

"And were you healed when you found me?"

"I would have never completely healed from losing you."

"Do you think you would have eventually remarried?"

"I really don't know.  I want to say 'no' but I don't know if that would be for sure.  But at the time I found you, I didn't even consider dating anyone."

"Why did you fall in love with Stephanie?" she asked, curiously, wanting to understand what he used to love about her, that would make him never be completely over her.

"She was," Chris paused, "Beautiful.  Inside and out, everything about her was just so… utterly…beautiful.  She was spectacular, her personality, sense of humor, her kindness.  I even loved her flaws."

"And what were those?"

"You really want to know?" Chris said, amused.

"Yeah."

"You were a horrible singer, you could not sing if your life depended on it.  And your voice, well, it got screechy sometimes.  And you had a temper, you could scare anyone while you were angry."

"Sounds like I used to be a great person," Stephanie said.

"You were," Chris told her, leaning over to kiss her, "Now go get some sleep."

"Ok," Stephanie said getting up, "And Chris, thanks for telling me all this stuff."

"It's ok, you want to know about yourself, you know where to find me."

~THE NEXT DAY~

Chris walked into the living room and looked at the occupants.  His wife and daughter were sitting in the living room watching television, and Chris smiled as Regan and Stephanie laughed about something that had just happened.  He knew Stephanie had been upset about what she had seen last night, and he hoped that she felt better today.

"Daddy, can go to the park?" Regan asked, looking at him.

"Sure," Chris said smiling at her, "Steph, did you want to come?"

"Of course I want to come, lead the way."

"There's a park a couple blocks from here," Chris told her, getting off the couch.  He held out his hand to Stephanie, helping her off the couch.

"Thanks," she said.

"Let's go," Regan yelled, as she ran for the front door.

"Hold on Princess, wait for us," Chris said as he and Stephanie made their way to the door.

They all walked outside, and started walking towards the park.  Stephanie took Chris's hand, and held it tightly in hers, sending him a smile when he looked at her.  His other hand was being held by Regan, who knew better than to walk alone.

"So is this park nice?" Stephanie asked.

"Yeah, it is, Regan and I like to go there when we're at home."

"They have swings!" Regan told Stephanie.

"Ooh, swings, those are my favorite."

"Me too!" Regan said happily, making Chris and Stephanie laugh.

They arrived at the park and Regan immediately ran for the playground.  Stephanie and Chris let her play with some of the other children there as they sat on the park bench keeping a close eye on her.  Stephanie sighed as Chris put his arm around her, and pulled her closer to him.

"You ok?" Chris asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"You sure, you seemed down after last night."

"I was, a little.  I think I just have to reconcile with the fact that I missed so much, and the stuff I didn't miss, I can't remember, except for bits and pieces."

"Stephanie, I know I keep saying this, but it'll all be ok, we can build a new life."

"I guess so," Stephanie said.  Regan ran over and stopped in front of them.

"Push me on swings Daddy?" Regan asked.

"Sure Princess," Chris said, getting up, "Coming Steph?"

"Yeah," Stephanie said smiling.

They went over to the swing set, and Chris helped Regan onto one of the swings.  He started pushing her as she giggled.  Stephanie smiled softly as she watched Chris and Regan.  She could tell that Regan adored Chris, and the same went for him.  She was fortunate that she had them both in her life, even if she couldn't remember everything about them.  What she did know about them, she loved, and wanted to be a part of it.  She walked over, and sat on the swing next to them, swinging softly as the wind swept through her hair.

 She closed her eyes, just enjoying the swinging motion, lulling her into daydreams.  She felt free as she felt herself lifted off the ground.  It was kind of the way that being around Chris made her feel.  Like she was flying.

"Mama, watch!" Regan cried, and Stephanie opened her eyes.

"I'm watching sweetie."

"I swing high," she said delightedly.

"You are, and you know what I like to do when I swing high?"

"What?"

"I like to jump off, like this," Stephanie said jumping off the swing as it was in mid-air.

She landed, and felt her ankle twist, and a sharp pain shoot through her.  She collapsed on the ground crying out in pain.  Chris stood shocked for a moment, then took Regan off the swing before rushing over to Stephanie.

"What happened?"

"Ow, I think I sprained my ankle," Stephanie said, obviously in pain.

"Let me look at it," Chris said, lifting up her jeans a little.  She winced as he prodded her ankle.

"Ow, that hurts," she cried.

"Yeah, it's swelling, you probably sprained it, we should get you to the emergency room."

"Fine," Stephanie said, trying to get up.

"Here, let me," Chris said, sweeping Stephanie into his arms, "It's easier this way."

"Ok," Stephanie said, smiling through her pain.

"Regan, walk right next to me ok?"

"Yes, Daddy."

Together they walked over to his car, and Chris gently set Stephanie in the back seat, before helping Regan into the car.  They drove fairly quickly over to the hospital, and checked Stephanie into the emergency room.

After x-rays, and a thorough examination, it was determined that Stephanie had indeed sprained her ankle.  They wrapped it up, gave her some crutches and sent her home.  Chris was helping her hobble up the steps a little while later.

Later that evening, after Regan had gone to bed, Chris and Stephanie were sitting on the couch watching some television.  Stephanie had her ankle propped up, and had some ice on it.

"I'm so clumsy," Stephanie said rolling her eyes.

"Well, you probably shouldn't have jumped off that swing," Chris said cheekily.

"Whatever," Stephanie said, yawning rather ungracefully.

"You should probably get some rest, it'll do your ankle good."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Stephanie said, getting up slowly and reaching for her crutches.  She pulled herself up and started to hobble awkwardly towards the stairs.

"Hold on Stephanie," Chris said, taking her in his arms in one fluid motion, "I'll just carry you upstairs."

"You don't have to," Stephanie said as she dropped her crutches, and wrapped her arms securely around his neck.

"I want to."

Chris took her upstairs, going slowly so he wouldn't aggravate her ankle, and so he could balance himself on the stairs.  He walked down the hallway to her bedroom, and kicked the door open with his foot.  He walked over to the bed and set her down gently.

"There you go," Chris whispered softly, "Sweet dreams."

Chris turned to leave, but before he could, he felt Stephanie's hand on his arm.  He turned back around, wondering if she needed anything.  She looked up at him and smiled softly.

"Is there something you needed Steph?"  Stephanie grabbed his arm and brought him down to her, kissing him soundly.

"You," she answered simply.

"What?"

"I want you Chris," she said seductively, kissing him again.

"Are you sure?" Chris asked, not wanting to do anything Stephanie didn't want to.

"As sure as I have been about anything."

Chris closed the distance between them and her lips seized his.  He pulled her closer to her, and she melted into his embrace.  He put everything he had into the kiss.  How much he had missed her, how much he loved her, how glad he was to have her back.


	19. Chapter 19

Chris slowly opened his eyes when the first rays of sun peeked their way through the windows. He blinked a few times, trying to figure out where he was. He wasn't in his room, and wasn't in his bed. And he certainly wasn't alone.  
  
Chris looked down and saw Stephanie cuddled up to him, her head resting gently on his chest, her hair splayed under her. Chris wanted to pinch himself and make sure that he wasn't dreaming. He had to be dreaming, this was just too good to be true. He was here with Stephanie in his arms, waking up to her beautiful face once again.  
  
He noticed Stephanie starting to wake up, and he gently caressed her hair, smoothing it against her bare back. Stephanie blinked a few times, trying to get her bearings back. She yawned, and looked up to see Chris smiling down at her.  
  
"Morning," he whispered.  
  
"Morning to you, how'd you sleep?"  
  
"Better than I have in years."  
  
"I'm glad," she said, laying her head back on his chest.  
  
"How's your ankle?"  
  
"Not bad."  
  
"I can't believe this happened."  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"It's just I never thought I'd ever get you back, and here you are, here we are."  
  
"I know I'm not the Stephanie that I used to be, but-"  
  
"I don't care, I love you now, and I'll love every single thing you are, will be, or used to be."  
  
"Chris, I want to tell you something, something important."  
  
"Go ahead," Chris told her, giving her his full attention. He couldn't help but be a little worried she was going to say she regretted last night.  
  
"I love you too," Stephanie said simply.  
  
Chris froze for a second, hearing the very words that he dreamed of hearing from her. The last words that Stephanie had said to him before the day he thought she had died were "I love you too." For the past two years those words had been imprinted in his brain, playing in an endless loop. Whenever he had found himself lost, or down, or sad, he would think about the way Stephanie had said those words.  
  
"Chris, are you ok? I didn't mean to- I can take it back if you don't want to hear it."  
  
"No, no, I just, it's been so long since I've heard those words from you," Chris said happily, choking back tears that were starting to come to his eyes.  
  
"I do love you. Maybe it's a combination of what I used to feel, and how I feel now, but I love you."  
  
"I love you too."  
  
"Thank you for allowing me back in your life, and giving me the opportunity to love you again."  
  
"How could I not? You're not just my wife, you're the mother of my child. Even if I didn't want you back, I owed it to Regan."  
  
"I'm glad you did."  
  
"What time is it?"  
  
"Um," Stephanie looked at the clock, "6:45"  
  
"Well, I better get out of here," Chris said, sitting up.  
  
"What, where are you going?" Stephanie asked, sitting up as well.  
  
"Back to my room."  
  
"So you sleep with me, and then you leave?" Stephanie said, confused.  
  
"Never, but sometimes Regan comes into my room in the morning, and I don't want her coming into an empty room. It could scare her or something."  
  
"Oh, I see."  
  
"Though you do make it very hard to leave," Chris said, leaning over to kiss her, before putting his boxers on.  
  
"How about I just come with you?"  
  
"To my room?"  
  
"Well, I figure that we'd be sharing a bed now, am I wrong in making that assumption? We are husband and wife after all."  
  
"Yeah, I just, well...sure you can come, just put some clothes on first," Chris said laughing.  
  
"No, I was just going to walk around naked, and hope for the best," Stephanie said, sticking her tongue out.  
  
Stephanie put her pajamas back on before following Chris down the hallway. They went into his bedroom, and settled themselves back into bed. Stephanie felt herself getting tired again, and started drifting off.  
  
"Steph?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"I really, really missed you."  
  
"I know," she whispered before falling asleep again.  
  
~A COUPLE HOURS LATER~  
  
Regan got out of bed, and walked down the hallway. She slowly opened Chris's door, and peeked her head in. She saw Chris and Stephanie sleeping in the bed, and crept into the room. She climbed onto the bed, and laid herself between her parents.  
  
"Daddy," she whispered. Chris stirred but didn't wake up.  
  
"Daddy!" she whispered again, a little more loudly this time. Stephanie heard her, and opened her eyes.  
  
"Hey baby," Stephanie said quietly. Regan turned her body towards Stephanie.  
  
"Hi Mama, I wake up Daddy."  
  
"Why don't we let him sleep, he looks tired?"  
  
"Ok."  
  
"Too late," Chris said, as Regan and Stephanie turned towards him.  
  
"Daddy!" Regan said, going willingly into his arms as he held them open for her.  
  
"Good morning baby, can I have a kiss?" Regan complied, and then laid back down on the bed.  
  
"We go to wefwing today," Regan said definitively.  
  
"I know," Chris answered.  
  
"Oh, yeah, I completely forgot, I had other things on my mind," Stephanie said, sending Chris a look, which he smiled at.  
  
"I understand," Chris said winking at her.  
  
"Where are we going again?"  
  
"Just over to Hartford, we get to sleep in our own beds tonight."  
  
"Well, we better get a move on," Stephanie said, getting out of bed, and getting ready for the day.  
  
**********************  
  
"So, I wanted to ask your opinion on something," Chris told Kurt, later that day at the arena. Stephanie and Regan weren't around.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I was going to ask Stephanie to marry me."  
  
"Um, Chris, you guys are already married," Kurt said, his brow furrowing in confusion.  
  
"I know that dumbass, but she can't remember our wedding, don't you think your wedding is something that you should remember?"  
  
"You've got a point."  
  
"So I'm not being a complete doofus for wanting to ask her again?"  
  
"No, not any more than usual."  
  
"Thanks," Chris said sarcastically, "I just don't know how to go about it."  
  
"Well, how did you propose to her last time?"  
  
"I told her she was stuck with me."  
  
"Wow, that sounds romantic," Kurt said blandly.  
  
"You know Stephanie, or at least the old Stephanie, she didn't ever want romantic, she wanted straight-forward."  
  
"Yeah, well, what about this Stephanie?"  
  
"Well, she does like romantic stuff, but not so much, but she doesn't like the straight-forward approach either, she's in the middle."  
  
"So do something moderately romantic."  
  
"Like what?"  
  
"I don't know!"  
  
"Like, drop her ring in a champagne glass or something?"  
  
"You have a ring."  
  
"I have her old ring, she never took it on her trip."  
  
"Are you trying to be cheap and not buy her a new ring?"  
  
"No! I just figure giving her, her old ring, it might spark a memory, and besides it has sentimental value."  
  
"Still hoping for her memory to come back?"  
  
"Well, she can remember a little bit, but yeah, I guess I'll always hold out hope that she'll get it back."  
  
"But she loves you. You said she told you this morning."  
  
"Kurt, you are an idiot, I know she loves me, that's not the point. The point is, I want her to remember us. I just want her to know what we had," Chris said sighing, "It sucks being the only one who can remember things like our first date, or our wedding and stuff."  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"It's ok, so how do I propose to her?"  
  
************************  
  
Over the next few days, Chris tried to think of the perfect way to propose to Stephanie. He wanted it to be perfect. It was like he had to start all over again with Stephanie. The last time he had proposed, it hadn't been all that romantic, more a spur of the moment type of proposal. This time, he wanted to plan it out perfectly, he wanted to make it memorable.  
  
He finally thought he had the perfect plan, and he was waiting for the perfect moment to execute it. He figured next Monday at Raw would be perfect. He was a little bit on edge though, not wanting his plans to be revealed to anyone.  
  
"Chris," Stephanie said, walking into the bedroom. Chris jumped at her voice, and quickly put the ring in the drawer.  
  
"Yeah, Steph?"  
  
"Um, are you ok, you seem kind of jumpy?" Stephanie said, walking over to stand in front of him.  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine, you just startled me right there."  
  
"Ok, you sure?" Stephanie asked, still a bit concerned.  
  
"Of course, now why are you here?" Chris said, pulling her into his lap.  
  
"I just wanted to tell you that dinner is almost ready and you might want to come down so we can eat."  
  
"I'll be right down," Chris said, kissing her.  
  
"So what's in the drawer?" Stephanie asked.  
  
"What are you talking about?" Chris asked as nonchalantly as he could.  
  
"I saw you put something in there, are you going to tell me, or am I going to have to find out myself?" Stephanie said, reaching for the drawer.  
  
"Hey, none of your business," Chris said grabbing her arm before she could reach the drawer.  
  
"Are you keeping secrets from me?" Stephanie said suspiciously.  
  
"Maybe, maybe not," Chris said, kissing her lightly, "But you're just going to have to wait to find out."  
  
"You're no fun."  
  
"All in due time baby, all in due time."  
  
"Whatever, let's go eat," Stephanie said, getting up, and pulling him by the hand.  
  
***********************  
  
Chris paced nervously around his dressing room. Tonight was the night he was going to propose, and he was nervous. He didn't remember being so nervous last time he had proposed. Maybe because last time, he hadn't thought about proposing, he had just come out and said what he felt.  
  
He breathed deeply, trying to calm his nerves down. Stephanie was in a meeting, and he was waiting for her to come back. He had Kurt waiting outside ready to tell him when Stephanie was coming. Regan was with Linda, who was making a rare appearance at a show tonight.  
  
"Chris, she's coming," Kurt said, poking his head through the door.  
  
"Ok," Chris said nodding. Kurt closed the door, leaving Chris alone momentarily.  
  
Stephanie opened the door and walked in, "Hey there."  
  
"Hey Steph, how was the meeting?"  
  
"It was good, you look a little pale, are you all right?" Stephanie asked, studying his face.  
  
"Yeah, it's just kind of hot in here."  
  
"Did you want to go outside and get some fresh air, it might do you some good?"  
  
"No, um, could you just get me my tights, they're in that bag right next to you," Chris said, pointing to a lone duffel bag.  
  
"Sure, no problem," Stephanie said, bending down to go into the bag. She unzipped the bag, and didn't find anything inside, "Chris, there's no tights in here."  
  
"Are you sure, look harder."  
  
"Um, ok," Stephanie answered, looking again.  
  
She unzipped the bag all the way, and saw absolutely nothing inside. She stuck her hand inside, searching in the corners of the bag. Her hand fell on something small and square, and she grabbed it. She pulled it out and realized it was a ring box. What was Chris doing with a ring box?  
  
"Chris, this was the only thing in there, did you forget your tights?" Stephanie said, standing up.  
  
"Open the box," Chris told her.  
  
"I don't think tights will fit in this box," Stephanie said laughing.  
  
"Just open it."  
  
Stephanie opened it and saw a ring sitting inside. It was beautiful, a rather large diamond surrounded by two smaller diamonds. And it looked to be platinum. She looked at the ring, and then at Chris, and then at the ring again.  
  
"What's this?" Stephanie asked, with wide eyes.  
  
"It's yours, but you can't have it until you answer one question."  
  
"Question?" Chris got down on one knee in front of her.  
  
"Will you marry me?"  
  
"But we're already married," Stephanie told him.  
  
"I know, but you can't remember our last wedding, and I want a wedding that we can both remember."  
  
"Really?" Stephanie asked, getting choked up with emotion.  
  
"Yes, I want to start a new life with you, and what better way then to get married again."  
  
"Then of course I'll marry you, or renew our vows, or whatever, just YES!"  
  
Chris stood up, and took Stephanie into his arms. She hugged him tightly, before pulling away and kissing him passionately. He kissed her back, and smiled as they pulled away from each other. He took the ring from its box and slid it onto her finger.  
  
"The ring seems vaguely familiar," Stephanie said.  
  
"It should, it was the engagement ring I gave you four years ago. You never brought it on the trip."  
  
"Wow, it really is beautiful."  
  
"You picked it out, we bought it together."  
  
"I had good taste then."  
  
"Of course you did, you married me didn't you?" 


	20. Chapter 20

A/N: Once again, thank you for all the reviews, I actually extended the story because of them. :)  
  
~  
  
"Hey Kurt, you wanna be my best man?"  
  
"Why am I getting a feeling of déjà vu?" Kurt asked, laughing.  
  
"Maybe because you've already been my best man."  
  
"So I gotta come up with a whole other speech," Kurt whined.  
  
"Oh come on, you practically have it written. Look at all the material that you have. We all thought Stephanie died, I was heartbroken, left alone to raise our child. Two years later, I visit her supposed gravesite, only to find my wife isn't as dead as she seems. She has no memory, but I convince her we're married. We part ways, only to have her come back to me. We fall in love all over again, despite her loss of memory and we're getting married again."  
  
"Well, that is a pretty good story."  
  
"Pretty good?" Chris snorted, "Come on Angle, it's practically a soap opera."  
  
"Yeah, you're right."  
  
"So, will you be my best man again?"  
  
"Sure man, I'd be honored."  
  
"I know, that's what you said last time."  
  
"Always the best man, never the groom," Kurt pouted.  
  
Stephanie walked into the room and saw the two of them talking. She walked over to Chris and kissed his cheek. Chris wrapped an arm loosely around her shoulders. It felt so right to be with her again.  
  
"Wow, this is a picture I never thought I'd see," Kurt said.  
  
"What do you mean?" Stephanie asked, cocking her head slightly in confusion.  
  
"Just you two I guess. I still find it a little hard to believe you're still alive Steph. I mean, you were gone for such a long time."  
  
"Well, how do you think that I feel?" Jericho said.  
  
"Like your on top of the world?" Kurt suggested.  
  
Jericho kissed Stephanie's temple, "Yeah, pretty much."  
  
"I'm the one without a memory, it's the weirdest for me. I hardly remember any of you."  
  
"I'm so deeply hurt that you could possibly forget me," Kurt said, mock indignantly.  
  
"Wait, I think that sometimes I get these memories of an idiot, that wouldn't happen to be you would it Kurt?" Stephanie joked.  
  
"No, you're probably just thinking about Chris," Kurt countered.  
  
"Hey!" Chris interjected, "I'm about to take back that best man invitation."  
  
"Oh, Kurt's going to be your best man?"  
  
"Yup. Just like the first time," Kurt said proudly.  
  
"That's nice. I didn't have any bridesmaids or anything last time, from what I saw on the video. Why is that?"  
  
"You wanted to be the center of attention," Chris answered her. Stephanie laughed quietly.  
  
"Oh, that explains it. Should I have some this time?"  
  
"If you want."  
  
"Well, we're keeping it pretty simple right?" she asked.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Then I guess it can just be me."  
  
"That's fine."  
  
"I'm going to head out guys, I got a match coming up soon that I gotta get ready for."  
  
"Ok, bye Kurt," Stephanie said.  
  
"Yeah, bye man."  
  
Kurt left and Chris pulled Stephanie closer to him. She smiled up at him, before he lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her deeply. She wrapped her arms around him and ran her hands along the back of his neck. Just then, Shane walked in with his daughter in one arm, and Regan holding his free hand.  
  
"There are children in the room," Shane joked.  
  
Chris and Stephanie broke apart guiltily, and both mumbled, "Sorry."  
  
"I should hope so," Shane laughed.  
  
Regan ran up to Chris and held her arms out, "Wanna be carried."  
  
"Ok baby," Chris said, picking Regan up. She wrapped her arms around his neck and laid her head down on her shoulder.  
  
"I got to howd Sam," Regan said giddily.  
  
"You did?" Chris said, acting amazed.  
  
"Uh huh. Unca Shane and Auntie Rissa let me howd her."  
  
"Cause you're a big girl."  
  
Regan smiled happily, "I your baby though, right Daddy?"  
  
"Of course you're my baby," Chris said, kissing her cheek. Regan smiled widely.  
  
"So how are the wedding plans going?" Shane asked.  
  
"One month to go and counting," Stephanie said, "I think we're doing ok, right Chris?"  
  
"Yeah, we got the place booked, I've got my tux, Stephanie has her dress ready, most everything is on schedule."  
  
"My dress is pretty," Regan told them.  
  
"Is it baby?" Chris asked, having not seen her in it.  
  
"Yes, Mama say I look boowful."  
  
"You did look beautiful," Stephanie told her.  
  
"So Steph, have any more memories?" Shane asked.  
  
"A few, not too many though," Stephanie said, somewhat morosely.  
  
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring it up," Shane apologized.  
  
"It's ok, c'est la vie right?" she shrugged.  
  
Shane's daughter started to cry, "I better get her back to Marissa, bye you guys."  
  
Stephanie sat down on the couch and stared off into space. Chris noticed and sat down with Regan sitting his lap. He sat there silently for a few moments as Regan busied herself with some toys. Stephanie seemed to be on a different planet altogether.  
  
"Steph, is everything ok?"  
  
She turned to him, "Yeah, everything's fine."  
  
"You sure? You seem distant."  
  
"I was just thinking," she told him.  
  
"About what?"  
  
"It's nothing."  
  
"Well, if it's nothing, it wouldn't be so bothersome, come on, tell me," he coaxed.  
  
"I don't know, it's just sometimes, I feel so lost."  
  
"How so?"  
  
"It's hard to explain."  
  
"Has someone been giving you a hard time?" he asked.  
  
"No, nothing like that."  
  
"Then what is it?"  
  
"I feel like...everyone is in on this little secret, and I'm the only one who doesn't know it. Like, everyone knows my past, except me."  
  
"Steph--"  
  
"And it scares me," she kept talking, "It scares me how much I want to remember. It scares me that I am willing to do anything to get it back. I want it back Chris, I want it all back."  
  
"I know you do sweetie, but it's not just going to come back. And you keep remembering stuff. One day, you'll wake up and there it will be. And then you'll divorce me when you remember me," he said laughing.  
  
"I don't think I'd do that," she said.  
  
"Yeah, you were willing to put up with me before."  
  
"See, you talk about the past, and I'm so desperate to remember," Stephanie said, as tears started to fall.  
  
"Steph, you have to be patient," Chris said, soothingly.  
  
Regan looked up from her toys, "Mama, why cry?"  
  
"I'm just a little sad baby," Stephanie said, wiping her eyes.  
  
"Wanna hug?" Regan asked, innocently.  
  
Stephanie smiled, "I would love one."  
  
"Ok, sowwy Daddy, Mama want hug," Regan said, climbing off his lap.  
  
"I think I'll be ok baby."  
  
Regan made her way over to Stephanie, and stood up on the couch. She wrapped her little arms around Stephanie and hugged her tightly. Stephanie's smile widened as her little girl hugged her. She hugged her back just as tight.  
  
"Better?" Regan asked as she pulled away.  
  
"Much better, thank you sweetie."  
  
"You're welcome," she said, then she climbed off the couch and played with some of her toys scattered around.  
  
"You did such a wonderful job with her," Stephanie commented. Chris watched Regan for a moment.  
  
"It was hard, but she's more than worth it."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Besides, only she could turn your darkest mood bright again. Trust me, I've been there."  
  
"You have?"  
  
"Stephanie, I lost you. I lost you, and I had nothing left except for her. Trust me, she's the reason I'm still on this Earth."  
  
"I think I'd stick around the Earth for her too."  
  
"I think you already did." 


	21. Chapter 21

"Stephanie, are you almost ready?" Chris called from downstairs.  
  
"Yes," she called out.  
  
"Mama, I wanna wear make-up," Regan said as she sat on the bed watching Stephanie.  
  
"Ok, come here baby."  
  
Regan hopped off the bed and ran to Stephanie. Stephanie picked up Regan and sat her on the vanity. Stephanie picked up some blush and gently brushed a little over Regan's cheeks. Regan giggled and smiled. Stephanie kissed the tip of her nose, and Regan's face scrunched up.  
  
"You look beautiful," Stephanie told her.  
  
"You too Mama," Regan said.  
  
"Thank you baby, do you want a little lipstick?"  
  
"Okay," Regan said brightly. Stephanie took a tube of lip gloss, and put a little on Regan's lips.  
  
"Now go like this," Stephanie said pressing her lips together. Regan did as she was told.  
  
"Now what is going on in here," a voice came from the doorway.  
  
Stephanie smiled at Chris, "We're getting beautiful."  
  
Chris walked in a little, "But I think you're both already beautiful."  
  
"Yes, but we want to be more beautiful, right Regan?" Stephanie said, turning to the little girl.  
  
"Right," Regan said nodding her head.  
  
Chris shook his head, "You two are too much, what am I going to do with you?"  
  
"Who knows?" Stephanie said.  
  
"I think I'll do this."  
  
Chris started tickling the both of them. Regan giggled, while Stephanie tried to get Chris off of her. Chris picked up Regan with one hand and pulled Stephanie on the bed with the other. He continued tickling them, as everyone was laughing hysterically.  
  
By some act of God, Stephanie managed to pin Chris down to the bed. He smiled up at her innocently. She smiled back down at him, but her was full of mischief.  
  
"Regan, what should we do to Daddy?" Stephanie said.  
  
"Wha Mama?"  
  
"I think we should tickle Daddy."  
  
"Ok," Regan said, smiling.  
  
"Do I have a say in this?" Chris said.  
  
Stephanie shook her head, "Let's get him Regan."  
  
They started tickling him, and Chris couldn't hold in his laughter. They were all laughing again before they got tired of tickling and lay down on the bed. Chris kissed Regan's forehead, then leaned over to kiss Stephanie. Regan laid down in between Chris and Stephanie.  
  
"You messed up my hair," Stephanie commented.  
  
"I'm so sorry," Chris said, sarcastically.  
  
"I'm glad I came back," Stephanie said, out of the blue.  
  
"We're glad you came back Steph," Chris said sincerely.  
  
"We better get going though, my family is waiting," Stephanie said, sitting up.  
  
"Yeah, let's go."  
  
******************  
  
Stephanie and Chris watched as Regan ran into Vince and Linda's house. They laughed at her youthful exuberance. Stephanie was about to walk in after her, but Chris held her back for a second. He kissed her deeply, then pulled away to look in her eyes.  
  
"What was that for?" she asked.  
  
"Just seeing you and Regan earlier."  
  
"Huh?" she asked.  
  
"When you were gone, I was always afraid that Regan would suffer without having a mother. I mean, I tried my best, but I'm not a girl, and I always thought I wouldn't do a good job with her."  
  
"Chris, you did a wonderful job, I can't tell you that enough."  
  
"Thanks Steph, but I don't think I could've done what you do."  
  
Stephanie leaned in to kiss him, "I love you."  
  
"I love you too, so much," Chris whispered, "You don't even know how much."  
  
"You have forever to show me," she whispered back.  
  
"And I'm so glad about that."  
  
"Chris, Stephanie, are you coming inside?" Vince asked from the foyer.  
  
"Yeah, come on," Stephanie said, pulling Chris's hand.  
  
Everyone sat down at the large dining room table. The dinner was served, and everyone was chatting with each other as they ate. Chris helped Regan with her meal, and Stephanie smiled softly at them.  
  
"Stephanie, is your dress ready for the wedding?" Marissa asked.  
  
"Yeah, it's all done. I have it at home."  
  
"I bet it's gorgeous."  
  
"Yeah, I'm hoping."  
  
"Are you excited?" Linda asked.  
  
"Very," Stephanie grinned, then looked at Chris, who smiled as well.  
  
After dinner, Chris took Regan to go see Shane and Marissa's baby, who was upstairs sleeping. Marissa went with them. Vince and Linda were in the dining room cleaning up. Shane was sitting with Stephanie, a photo album in his lap.  
  
"This was us when we were little," Shane said, pointing to a picture.  
  
"Regan looks like I did when I was little," Stephanie commented.  
  
"Yeah, she does. I think that was a comfort while you were gone," Shane told her.  
  
"I can imagine."  
  
"Here's a family picture, you were just a baby."  
  
"I can see that," she laughed.  
  
"Any of this coming back?" Shane asked.  
  
"No, I'm sorry."  
  
"It's ok, I just thought that maybe it would trigger something."  
  
"Usually it just comes to me," she told him.  
  
"Oh."  
  
"I'm sorry I can't remember," Stephanie said, sadly.  
  
"It's ok Steph, I don't want to push or anything."  
  
"I know you want it back, so do I, but I can't force myself to remember."  
  
"If only we could huh?"  
  
"Yeah, if only," Stephanie sighed.  
  
Later that evening, Stephanie was thinking back to Shane trying to get her memory back. She appreciated his efforts, but she had tried everything to get it back, and it just wasn't coming. It was frustrating to say the least.  
  
She walked into the bedroom when she suddenly felt dizzy. The room was spinning, and she had to grab onto the dresser for support. She couldn't focus on anything. All these visions swirled before her eyes, but she couldn't get them to stop. They were all coming to fast. She could see flashes of Regan as a baby, of Chris, of her family, but she couldn't quite figure them out.  
  
Chris walked into the room and saw Stephanie leaning heavily against the dresser. She looked like she was about to faint. He rushed over to her, and took her in his arms. She fell against him.  
  
"Stephanie, are you ok?" Chris asked frantically. She didn't answer him.  
  
"Steph, what's wrong, tell me please," Chris pleaded desperately.  
  
The room suddenly stopped spinning. She furrowed her brow for a second in thought, then turned to Chris. He looked at her, worry the only emotion in his eyes. He looked like he was about to cry. She hugged him tightly.  
  
"Stephanie, are you ok?" Chris asked again.  
  
"Yeah," Stephanie whispered.  
  
"What happened?"  
  
"I don't know, I just got all these pictures."  
  
"Pictures?"  
  
"Like visions, or memories."  
  
"Your memory? Is it coming back?"  
  
"I don't know, it was like it was trying, but it just...didn't."  
  
"What did you see?"  
  
"Just flashes."  
  
"Maybe it'll come back soon," he said hopefully.  
  
"Maybe." 


	22. Chapter 22

A/N:  And now…the end is near…and so I face the final curtain…Yes folks, this is the final chapter of the saga that is "I Used to Know You."  Thank you for all the lovely reviews, e-mails, and everything else.  I'm so happy you liked this story, it was definitely one of my most favorite to write.  And if there's any interest at all, I just may write a sequel, but only if the people want one. :)

~

_"Christopher, you may say your vows now."_

_"Stephanie, what can I say that I haven't already told you before?  You're the most spectacular person I've ever known, and you have been since the moment I met you.  Everyday is an adventure with you, and that's why I look forward to seeing your face every morning.  You're beautiful, and not just on the outside, but you're so beautiful on the inside.  I remember one time, you saw a stray cat in an alley, and you took it home, and cared for it, of course you also gave it a really stupid name—"_

_"Mr. Boots was not a stupid name," Stephanie said laughing._

_"Hey, don't interrupt, and yes it was a stupid name.  But that's beside the point.  You gave that cat a home.  I'm so lucky that I got to meet you, I'm so lucky that you actually said yes when I asked you out.  I was so afraid that you would laugh in my face, but you didn't, thank God.  You make me laugh, and you make me smile, and you even infuriate me sometimes.  But I love all of that, I love all the good things about you, and I even love all the bad things about you, not that there are many of those.  And I want to build something with you, I want to have a home with you, and I want to have kids with you, because God knows, we'd have some gorgeous kids.  But most of all, I just want the opportunity to make you as happy as you make me, because Stephanie you make me so happy."_

Stephanie woke up, and immediately a smile played on her lips.  Today was her wedding day.  And she was going to make the most of it.  Granted this wasn't her first wedding day, but she wanted to make this as memorable for Chris as their first one had been.

They had been planning this wedding for the past two months, and the day had finally arrived.  They were holding it outdoors in a beautiful garden on a fancy estate.  They thought it had been the perfect place for them to hold their wedding.  It wasn't going to be as stuffy as Chris had said their first wedding was.  It was going to be more laid-back, and informal.

They had been swamped with wedding plans, and Stephanie wanted today to go off without a hitch.  She and Regan had spent the night at Vince and Linda's place, wanting to have a little tradition on the day.  Regan was going to be the flower girl, obviously, so she would be getting ready with Stephanie.  Suddenly the phone rang, and Stephanie answered.

"Hello?" she said.

"Good morning beautiful."

"You're not supposed to be talking to me," Stephanie said.

"Who cares, I miss you," Chris told her.

"Well, I guess it's ok, since we're already married."

"That's right.  I just wanted to ask how you were."

"I'm wonderful, better than wonderful, fantastic."

"That's good to hear, no cold feet?"

"How can I get cold feet if I'm already married to you?"

"Well, you can still get cold feet, besides you don't even remember our other wedding, you should be frantic, trying to make this wedding perfect."

"Are you going to be there?"

"Yeah, of course," Chris said perplexed.

"Then it'll be perfect."

"So how's my little girl?  Did she sleep alright without me in the house?"

"Well, she didn't seem to care, because she was out like a light last night."

"Where is she this morning?"

"I just got up Chris, I don't know where she is."  
"Ok, well don't let her go off by herself around the house I don't like that.  And make sure she eats breakfast."

"Chris, I know, she'll be fine, overprotective much?"

"She's my baby, I have every right to be overprotective of her."  Stephanie smirked mischievously.

"Fine, but I'm going to go now, I have to get ready."

"Ok, I love you, see you later."

"You'll see me down the aisle, love you," Stephanie said before hanging up.

*****************

Chris stood at the end of the aisle, waiting for Stephanie to come walking down it.  He wasn't as nervous as he was during his first wedding, but he was still a little nervous that something would go wrong.

Regan started walking down the aisle, smiling at everyone as she walked by them.  She had a basketful of roses that she was neatly throwing onto the ground, like she had been told.  Chris smiled as his little girl walked towards him, thinking she looked absolutely adorable.  She hardly ever wore dresses, so this was a new thing for him.

"Hi Daddy," Regan said waving at Chris.

"Hi Princess," Chris told her.  Regan walked over to him.

"I look pretty," she said grinning.

"You sure do," Chris said smiling at her.

"Can I stay with you?" Regan asked.

"Princess, you have to go sit with Grandma and Grandpa," Chris told her, kneeling down to her level.

"But I want to stay with you," Regan whispered to him.

"You can come over after we have the ceremony ok?"

"But Daddy, I want to stay with you and Kurt," Regan whined.

"Sweetie, I promise you can come over later," Chris said, causing Regan to pout, "Ok, you can stand next to Kurt."

"Yay," Regan said jubilantly.  Chris smiled as she went to stand next to Kurt who patted her on the head.

The wedding march started, and Chris turned his eyes towards the end of the aisle.  Stephanie walked out, a huge grin on her face.  Her dress was simple, a white silk gown that fell to the floor.  Her hair was pulled back into a bun, with baby's breath entwined in it.  She had a bouquet of lilies in her hands, and she walked down the aisle slowly.

She reached Chris, and set her flowers down on the waiting stool next to her.  She smiled and grabbed his hand giving it a quick squeeze.  Chris smiled back at her, happiness shining in his eyes.

"We are gathered here, to renew the vows of Christopher Jericho and Stephanie McMahon-Jericho.  They entered in marriage once before, and we are here today, to see them enter the bond of marriage once again.  Stephanie, if you will, you may say your vows."  

Stephanie grabbed a piece of paper that she had set down on the stool, and looked down at it.  Then she looked up at Chris, and smiled, before proceeding with her vows.

"When I wanted to waltz back into your life, you took me right back in, no questions asked.  You didn't have to do that, you could have turned me away, or simply slammed the door in my face, but you didn't.  You welcomed me back with open arms, even if I couldn't remember you.  You made me fall in love with you Chris, and I know that I was in love with you before, but I fell in love with you again, and for me now, it was the first time.  I thought that I would wander the Earth aimlessly, never finding the place where I fit.  And then I found it again, and it had been right where I left it, with you, and with Regan, and with all my friends and family.  So thank you to everyone for taking me back, but especially to you Chris, because I realized that you are what I've been looking for."

"Christopher, you may say your vows."

"I thought I had lost you.  I went for the longest time thinking that I was never going to be happy again, save for Regan.  You were my everything Stephanie, you were my life, and then you went away.  My heart was broken, I felt like I was drowning without you to keep me afloat, without you by my side.  I lived each and every day thinking about you, thinking about us.  And on the day that I thought I would be mourning your death, on the day I thought I would be seeing your final resting place, I found you again.  You may not be the same Stephanie that you once were, and you may be different in some ways, but deep down, you're still the same Stephanie that I fell in love with a long time ago.  And I love the changes in you.  And it doesn't matter if you don't remember me or us, or what we used to have, because I can remember for the both of us.  It took me a while, took us a while, but I'm finally whole again now that I have you."

"Christopher," the minister said, "Do you still take Stephanie McMahon-Jericho to be your wife?"

"I do," Chris said, smiling.

"Stephanie, do you still take Christopher Jericho to be your husband?"

"Yes, I do."

"Then, I re-pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss your bride."

Chris took Stephanie's face into his hands, and kissed her gently on the mouth.  She wrapped her arms around him and deepened the kiss.  Everyone clapped as they pulled apart.  Regan ran up to them, and Chris scooped her up into his arms, and kissed her cheek.

Everyone got up and started mingling with each other, leaving Stephanie and Chris standing together, with Regan in his arms.

"Chris, I have to give you my wedding presents for you," Stephanie whispered to him as they stood amongst everyone.

"You can give it to me later," Chris whispered back, "At the reception."

"I think I should give them to you now," Stephanie told him.

"If you insist, what is it?" Chris asked, turning his attention to her, as Regan talked to Kurt over his shoulder.

"Well, it's two things actually," Stephanie told him.

"Ok."

Stephanie took his free hand, and laid it gently on her abdomen, her hand resting on his.  She smiled up at Chris, and he got a bewildered look in his eyes before clarification rang through him.  He looked down at their hands, and back into her face.

"You mean?"

"Yeah," Stephanie nodded.

"Really?"

"Yes, really," Stephanie said laughing at the expression on his face.

"How far?"

"A month and a half," she answered.

"I get to have another Regan?" he said, smiling brightly.

"Well, either that or a little Chris."

"Wow, this is amazing."

"That's not the only thing," Stephanie told him.

"What?  There's more?"

"Just one more thing," Stephanie said, taking her hand and caressing his cheek slowly.

"Yeah?" Stephanie leaned in close to his ear so only he would hear.

"I have my memory back," she whispered quietly.  Chris pulled back in shock.

"You what?"

"You heard me," she said smiling, "And you're not deaf, so don't pretend to be."

"Well that was a typical Stephanie response, you must have your memory back."

"You're damn straight."

"Since when?"

"Since this morning."

"But how?"

"I don't know but I do."

"You can remember everything?"

"Everything."  

"So why didn't you tell me this morning?"

"Well, what's the fun in that?  I got a whole wedding out of it.  No way was I going to give up a chance to have everyone look at me."

"You don't know how much I've missed you."

"Oh, so you didn't like the new me?" she asked, smiling.

"I did, but I missed the old you."

"And why is that?"

"Because only the old you could be an utter bitch and still have me love you."

"Oh, so now I'm being a bitch?"

"If the shoe fits darling," he said, smirking.

"You're lucky I love you.  And you're very lucky I'm still alive."

"Well, I can't argue with that.  I guess even death can't separate us."  She smirked and shook her head.

"Death knows better than to screw around with Stephanie McMahon-Jericho."

Stephanie leaned up to kiss Chris.  He pulled away and looked into her eyes, seeing the spark that only his old Stephanie could have.  She was really here with him.  He had his wife back with him, and his daughter in his arms.  His life was complete.

And so he smiled.

//We climbed, he first and I behind, until,

through a small opening ahead of us

I saw the lovely things the heavens hold,

and we came out once more to see the stars.//

THE END

~

A/N: The quote above is from Dante's Divine Comedy Vol. I: Inferno. 


End file.
